Michaelandia Republic

The "Yeys" and "Boos" of the Last Couple of Months

2008-01-23T19:46:00.001+08:00

Movies:
Enchanted - Yey! brought my sister along, para di dyahe manood. haha
The Kingdom - Boo! sux...
Sweeney Todd - Boo! Emo musical!
I am Legend - Boo! Will Smith == Black Tom Cruise
Eastern Promises - Boo! held promise, until blatant exposure of Viggo Mortinsen's penis
The Golden Compass - Boo! Lord of the Rings Poser.
National Treasure Book of Secrets - Boo! Wasted my F*ckin' Time and Money. Worst movie of the year.

Music:
The brilliant green - Yey! Jpop Rocks!
Marie Digby - Yey! Don't know who she is? Search her on Youtube
Urbandub - Yey! There's hope or OPM yet

TV Shows:
Heroes episodes 1 - 6 - Boo!
Heroes episodes 7 - 11 - Yey!
Psych - Yey! my new favorite show. haha!
Zaido - Do you have to ask? Boo Boo Boo BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Sports:
Mayweather knocks out Hatton - Yey! Lupet.
Upcoming Pacquiao VS Marquez - Yey! Para sayo... ang laban na to....
Rumored Pacquiao VS Hatton - Yey! punish manny pacquiao for sticking his tongue inside Valerie Concepcion's mouth Hatton!
Lakers are winning - Yey! Go Kobe!
Heat are on a 14 game losing streak - Yey! Look who's laughing now fatso (Shaq)

Pinoy Showbiz:
Pinoy Big Brother (with Mariel inside house) - Yey! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! =)
Pinoy Big Brother (sans Mariel) - Zzzzzzz..... Boo!
Dennis Trillo - Boo!
Cristine Reyes on FHM - Yey! Ooooooohhh Yeah!
Dennis Trillo on Cristine Reyes - Boo! Lucky Bastard...

Homophobia:
Heath Ledger is Dead - Boo! By dying, he has made Brokeback Mountain a Classic. Eew.
He finished his part for Batman Dark Knight though - Yey! Buti nalang...
Found out Dumbledore is GAY!!! - Boo! NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
My Chemical Romance is performing at the Fort this Friday - Boo!
Traffic is gonna be hell - Double Boo!
Chemical Romance Front man is Gay - Hell Yeah! In your face stupid Emo fools!!!!

Stuff I Own:
Leah Dizon Photo Book - Super Yeah! Thanks Kabo!
SMART Bro - Boo! More like Smart BroKEN! Die Mother F*ckers, Die!
NBA live network play on my PSP during free time at work - Yey
Constantly being owned in NBA Live - Boo.... Sad...
Bought new shoes - Yey!
Got Drunk and puked on my New Shoes - Boo!

My Life

2007-11-16T23:32:00.000+08:00

#define ON 1
#define OFF 0

typedef struct
{
unsigned long WakeUp :1;
unsigned long Shower :1;
unsigned long StuffMyFace :1;
unsigned long Travel :1;
unsigned long TwiddleMyThumbs :1;
unsigned long Oogle :1;
unsigned long Pretned2Work :1;
unsigned long Hmmmmmm :1;

} ACTIONS_STRUCT;

ACTIONS_STRUCT Actions;

void main()
{
unsigned long Time;

while(1)
{
do
{
Time = get_time();

switch (Time) {
case 520:
Actions.WakeUp = ON;
Actions.Shower = ON;
execute_act();

case 600:
Actions.SuffMyFace = ON;
execute_act();

case 630:
//To Work
Actions.Travel = ON;
execute_act();
case 700:
//Arrive at Work
office_stuff(1200);

case 1200:
Actions.SuffMyFace = ON;
execute_act();
case 1300:
office_stuff(1700);

case 1700:
//Happy Happy Happy
//To House
Actions.Travel = ON;
execute_act();

case 1830:
home_stuff(2250);

default:
Actions.WakeUp = OFF;
execute_act();
}

get_day();

}while (EventParm.WeekDay == true)

//Week Ends To be coded.
//No Actions as of Yet
//Social Life to be Added

}
return;
}

void home_stuff(unsigned long StopTime)
{
unsigned long Time;

do
{
Time = get_time();

if (EventParm.JavTalkDownLoadEnd == true)
{
Actions.Hmmmmmm = ON;

//edit. Change to 'for loop'
execute_act();
execute_act();
execute_act();
execute_act();
}

if (EventParm.Hungry == true)
{
Actions.StuffMyFace = ON;
execute_act();
}

} while (Time != StopTime)

}

void office_stuff(unsigned long StopTime)
{
unsigned long Time;

do
{
Time = get_time();

//Optimize code. This if is never executed. Take it out.
if (EventParm.HotGirlisPresent == true)
{
Actions.Oogle = ON;
execute_act();
}

//This if else statement is not enough.
//Catch all Scenarios.
//i.e. if caught - KissAss = ON etc.
if (EventParm.BossIsNotLooking == true)
{
Actions.TwiddleMyThumbs = ON;
execute_act();
}
else
{
Actions.Pretend2Work = ON;
execute_act();
}

} while (Time != StopTime)

}

If I Were No 3. (Abridged Version)

2007-11-12T19:10:00.000+08:00

Since nothing interesting has happened recently, and I wanna get back to watching... uhm, stuff;

If I were a Heroes Character:

I'd be Ando.

Apathetic and Mediocre. That's me. He doesn't even have a freakin' power. Basically, He sucks...

But in a good way.

Coz he's funny.

If I were a Character from One Piece

I'd be Buggy the Clown

Why? Because he's an egotistical self centered guy, who has some talent, but not much (compared to the rest of the One Piece Populace). He's a boss early in the show. Which means he quickly becomes a comic relief character.

He's a Loser that can only beat characters that are more loserish (wow, new word) than him..

So if I ever beat you in anything before, consider yourself cannon fodder.

If I were a Character from Proposal Daisakusen

I'd be Iwase Ken.

No, not becuase I can relate to the character. No Way! Get real man. I am him kasi kasing gwapo ko sha. End of Story.

Haleluiah Chance!

Leah Speed Balls

2007-11-03T22:51:00.000+08:00

Balls

I watched Balls of Fury this afternoon. Yep, the ping pong movie (I'm not gonna waste my time writing a lengthy synopsis). It was kind of ok. Ther've been a lot of movies like this recently (comedies with some kind of sport in the middle of it); Nacho Libre, Blades of Glory, Talladega Nights and Dodge Ball. I have to say that this movie is the weakest of these movies. Why? Because the the protagonist is a fat, curly haired, rocker wanna be and guess what? It ain't Jack Black.

The whole movie seems to be tailor made for Jack Black. So much so that the producers probably went "Hey writer grunts, we're gonna get Jack Black to do a movie for us, no, we haven't asked him yet but there's no way he'd say no right? Write a script... and oh yeah, it has to have ping pong in it".

When the script was done and they offered him the movie, Mr. Black probably went Nnnnaaaahhh... Not Interested dudes, sorry... Lucha Libre!!!!".

Shit. But what about this perfectly good script about ping pong battles to the death!? Thought the producers. "What the hell, lets get somebody else". Then they searched high and low for a second rate actor who wouldn't mind being given the instructions; "When in doubt, think what Jack Black would do".

At least dodge ball had Vince Vaughn, Talladega Nights had Will Ferrell... Balls of Fury? No such luck.

Hey, at least it has Maggie Q (She's as hot as ever). Aside from that, it gave me a memorable line that I will now use every time I whoop somebody's ass in Ping Pong;

"My balls have been tempered by the fire of hell's dragon"

Speed

A friend of mine mentioned that there's gonna be a Speed Racer movie... and the Wachowski brothers (Matrix Trilogy, V for Vendetta) are gonna write and direct it! So, i went online and googled... and the rumor is...... TRUE!!! There's even is a cast!!!

Speed Racer - Emile Hirsch (Girl Next Door)
Trixie (Speed's Girlfriend) - Cristina Ricci
Pops Racer - John Goodman
Mom Racer - Susan Sarandon
Racer X - Matthew Fox (That Lost guy)
Speed Racer's Rival - Rain (the korean dude, Justin from full house hahahaha)

I never really followed the old Speed Racer anime... so I'm not really all that hyped... but it is gonna be directed by the Wachowskis, that's good right? That is, unless you ask Allan Moore. haha, sorry. Comic book Joke. XD

Leah

Here's a video of one of Leah Dizon's Music videos. Why am I posting it? To test video posting that's all. And oh yeah, to get on Kabo's nerves. Hahahaha!!! Pretty kaya nya oh!!!
Ung photobook ko men! Don't forget!

Life is a Junkie

2007-10-29T10:11:00.000+08:00

This is the first time I'm gonna write like this (and hopefully the last time too). I am going to be totally vague.

Life is a drug addict.

One day, everything is perfect. You feel better than you've been feeling in a long time. Life is good. And you think that the stupid grin on your face you see every time you look in the mirror is perfectly normal.

Then the next day, it crashes. The rose tinted window shatters. For some reason, you want to go out in the pouring rain, lift your face, raise both your hands and scream "Nnnnnnnnooooooooooo!!!!!!".

Off course, there are numerous metaphors out there that say the same damn thing. Like Ronan Keeting said "Life is a Roller Coaster", or Ate Charo from Maalala mo Kaya; "Parang Gulong ang Buhay".

But I find my description the most fitting right now thank you very much.

......

So there.

The Scariest Toy... Ever

2007-10-19T23:22:00.000+08:00

While passing through Megamall, I decided to window shop in Toy Kingdom to see the latest toys. What can I say, I just loooooovvvvvve toys!!! Weeeee!!!! Toy Kingdom is heaven to me. Paradise. My very own Ice Cream Land.

Anyways, while looking around, I came across, as the title of this posts states, the scariest toy EVER (disclaimer: at least to me)!!

For only 600 pesos, you can get your very own Chris Benoit, AKA "The Rabid Wolverine" AKA "Mr. I cross-faced my wife and son to death" action figure.

I can't believe toys of this guy are still being sold. Imagine going to sleep in your bed with a toy like this standing on your desk. (cue Chris Benoit music) Creepy man.

Unless they make Aikido Adolf (gas chamber sold separately), Stretch Sadam (with hang man rope) or Talking Osama (Push the button behind his back and here Osama say "Death to America"), this toy is the scariest toy I've ever seen

Mike's Top 5 Japanese Babes

2007-10-12T10:14:00.000+08:00

Hello! Here's a list of, in my opinion, the 5 Hottest Japanese Girls. Why make a list? Well, because I've got nothing better to write about since I've been living the life of a hermit in Laguna for the last two weeks (because of work) and because posting pictures of Hot Girls is number two in my list of the top three cool things to do when you're bored out of your mind. If you must know, number three is twiddling my thumbs and number one is surfing through youtube (while twiddling my thumbs, 'cuz my net is like soooooo bagal). Anywayz... enough of that! On with the List!

Number 5: Some Girl (Dunno her name, and I'm too lazy to look it up, but she's Rei from Proposal Daisakusen).
Mike's Stereotype: The Cutey

The only reason why you don't hate the living shit out her character in Proposal Daisakusen is because she's so darned cute. While watching the show, I ask myself; Why the hell is Kenzo (mr. protagonist) hopelessly in love with such a dense, inconsiderate, selfish girl?" Then she gets some camera time and smiles... The question vanishes into thin air.

She's number 5 because she has a cute smile and she can make a lot of cute silly faces (haha. parng anime).

Number 4: Horikita Maki
Mike's Stereotype: Ms. Virgin-Mary-Appeal

I didn't think Horikita Maki was "all that" before, probably because i'm not really in to the virgin mary thing. Then I saw her in Hanakimi (jdorama), then I became a fan. Maki is on the cute side of the babe coin (the other side being the "hot" side). That's why i'm a little surprised with the photo i got of the internet above, but i'm not complaining =).

Maki exudes this im-innocent-&-I-never-had-a-boyfriend-but-i'm-now-old-enough-so-i-want-one look.

Maki is number 4 because she's like your bestfriend's cute younger sister who has a crush on you, but if you do anything, said bestfriend would beat the crap out of you.

Number 3: Maria Ozawa
Mike's Stereotype: The Girl Next Door

When I first saw Maria Ozawa, I was like "Holy Sh*t, is that girl really a porn star!?" Then she takes her clothes off and starts doing some lucky japanese sunnavabitch. Damn. I remember i wrote a post about the movie "The Girl Next Door" (starring another hot babe Elisha Cuthbert) a few months back. I remember saying that the only drawback of that movie was that it wasn't believable because no American Porn star is as hot as Elisha Cuthbert. I guess that fact is not true in Japan. She can be my girl next door anytime.

Maria is number 3 because you'd be dying for her to go out with you, even though she's a hard core pornstar. Heck, you'd introduce her to your friends and family without being the least bit ashamed.... Ok, you'd probably LIE to your parents, but still....

Number 2: Kimura Kaela
Mike's Stereotype: The Rocker Chick

I first saw Kaela on Music Station (the jpop show on animax), she was wearing some teletubby looking costume (apparently she was supposed to be an alien or something) and I thought she was kinda cute. Now, if I thought she was cute wearing something like that, what more if she was out of it? I looked her up (in youtube where else) and after watching a couple of clips, I realized she was something like Madonna. Ok, wait, let me explain. No, she's not 40, and no, she doesn't kidnap babies from Africa. She constantly reinvents herself. Sometimes, she's normal (like the photo shown above), sometimes she shaves her head, sometimes she shaves just half of her head. She colors her hair purple. She wears, crazy clothes (like the alien suit and bee suit) etc.
But in all those "disguises", she still looks great!

Kaela is number 2 because she's a Rocker Chick who can still be cutey-cutey (like Rei, my number 5). She can wear silly things, look silly and act silly and still be beautiful. Since she's a rocker chick, she has that "one of the boys aura". Finally, I like her music, now if girls can soil their panties for an ugly bastard like Rico Blanco just because he has some cool songs, can't i go gaga over Kalea (even though she sings in Japanese and i have no idea what she's saying)?

Number 1: Leah Dizon
Mike's Stereotype: The Goddess

Technically, Leah shouldn't be part of this list since she's not Japanese. But since she's based in Japan and since it's MY list, I'll do whatever the hell I want!

Leah Dizon was actually a part time model based in Las Vegas. She's Half American and Half Filipno (yep). She ended up in japan because she kept a blog where she uploaded some of her pictures, and it received a LOT of hits from japanese fans. Some of them suggested she move to japan, so she did! The first time i saw her, i was instantly reminded of Final Fantasy.

Brief backstory. To those of you who don't know, Final Fantasy is a video game (RPG to be exact). Because of the advances in computer technology, I 'd like to think of the characters in the recent Final Fantasy incarnations as the new greek marble sculptures (they look like humans, if humans were perfect).

That is until i saw Leah Dizon. She looks like something out of Final Fantasy. Which is to say she looks too good to be true.

Leah Dizon is Number 1 because she's my goddess. She has the kind of look that i really fall for. She can be cute, but she can also be hot. She can even be both at the same time.

A friend of mine, opinionated guy that he is, believes that Leah Dizon is (gasp I can't say it)... Ugly. The only thing i can say to this is that any person who thinks Leah Dizon is NOT pretty is either totally nuts.... or gay. Nuts or gay. You decide man.

Right Leah?

Yes Leah, I'd like a taste of.... Uh whatever it is you're holding.

Oh God.

All Hail the Ping Pong King!

2007-10-06T20:55:00.000+08:00

To those of you who don't know, i've recently taken up playing table tennis... As you can probably deduce from the title of this post...

I am a Bad Ass Ping Pong Mother F*cker!!!

Of course, there are always nay sayers, who at first don't believe my seemingly ridiculous claim...

Take, i don't know, Fred Tay, for example...

Just this afternoon, Fred Tay had the audacity to challenge me at ping pong...
Needless to say, i beat the crap out of him with my spectacular backhands, amazing forehands and awe inspiring slices. He didn't even win one game against me. Believe me, he tried, we played more than 6 or 7 games, each ending in his utter and absolute defeat.

Because of my awesomeness... i have decided to associate myself with the following titles:

1. Ping Pong King (as stated in the title)
2. Bible of Ping Pong
3. Master Ping Pong (must be said with a chinese kung fu movie accent)
4. The Champ
5. Ping Pong Ninja
6. The Long Haired Warrior
7. Bitmicro's Black Flash

Hmm... eto lng naisip ko for now.

Ping Pong is now added to the list of things that mike is superior to fred.

Yeah!

I think i should take up badminton next. But first, i have to get rid of my habit of laughing my ass off when anyone mentions the word shuttlecock.

hahaha.

shuttlecock. shuttlecock.
hahaha. hahaha.

shuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecock
shuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecock.shuttlecockshuttlecock
shuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecock
shuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecockshuttlecock

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Reopening Soon!!!

2007-10-01T21:43:00.000+08:00

Hello True believers!!!

I just want to announce to all my fans that I, Mike the Glorious, will resume regular publication of my fantastiglorious writings very soon!!!

So, throw away your self help books (i.e. the purpose drive life of a rich dad) and unsubscribe from your filthy porn websites (or send the username and passwords to michaelandia@gmail.com)... you can again waste your time reading about stuff that i feel is vital to the survival of the human race.

you know... stuff like comics, books, movies, proof of the existence of god, existentialism the meaning of life, me, porn, me, jem and the holograms, me, the indigo girls, me, hermione granger's boobies, me, kevin's bacon, combatron, mark lapid's banana and of course much much more!!!

So stay tuned citizens of michaelandia!!!

p.s.
based from my previous entries, about six people read my blog... so,
to those of you who are reading my blog because you got a shameless plug from y.m. or something... i beg your forgiveness.

NOT!!!!

Give Me Back My Name

2006-12-25T22:33:00.000+08:00

Ask yourself this;

"What makes a guy, who hasn't touched his blog for about 3 months, post an entry on Christmas Day?"

I'll tell you what: His Name

A name is more than just letters stringed together, a name is an aspect of one's existence. In a way a name defines who a person is. A name makes a person an individual, it differentiates him or her from the rest oh humanity...

For about 20+ years, i have been confident in the knowledge that i am the only michael domondon that exists on this planet. My identity as a person was secure. I was special. i was unique...

Well apperently, i've been living a f**kn lie.

Just a couple of minutes ago, i tried searching for my name in google just for kicks, when i saw it. Someone else is using the divine, awesome, not to mention totally cool name that is michael domondon!!!!

Oh the outrage! Oh the humanity!

Of course i was curious about the dude, so i checked out his blog; If you wanna take a peek, be my guest.

http://gattacaboy.blogspot.com

But why you'd rather go over there instead of reading the awesomeness of my literary stylings i have no idea.

After a brisk assesment of his blog, i can say without a shadow of doubt, that i am absatively superior to that pirate, that bootlegger that... that name grabber, in every aspect. He should stop using that name at once.

Hey person-that-is-using-my-name, change your name to something else! You look more like a George, or a Borgy anyways.

The name Michael Domondon is already taken

Give me back my name damn you!!!

Conversation with "The One"

2006-09-17T15:39:00.000+08:00

Neo: The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work... when you go to church... when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

Mike: Erm... Okie

Neo: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.

Mike: I don't want no pills! What do you think I am?! Drugs?!

Neo: Then what do you want?

Mike: Eagle Eggs. Eagle Powers kick ass man!

Neo: I'm trying to free your mind, Mike. But I can only show you the door. You're the one that has to walk through it.

Mike: Yeah. Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal. But I think I may have a better one. How about, I give you the finger.

Neo: The Eagle Eggs are a lie! A lie! They give you no eagle powers! They give you no nutrients!

Mike: Whatever... eagle eggs are the bomb pare!

Neo: I know kung-fu.

Mike: No use threatening me man. I watched the movie. You do NOT know kung fu.

Neo: (using his cell phone) Mr. Wizard. Get me the hell out of here.

Mike: One thing before you go...

Neo: Yes?

Mike: The Lake House was crap.

Ready Steady Bowl!

2006-09-11T19:47:00.000+08:00

Hello true believers! I went bowling about a week ago. This post is about bowling. Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Transcending history and the world… is a tale of brave bowlers eternally told…

Each of them a legend in their own right, each of them gifted by the bowling gods with a distinct bowling style, all, but one of them, really suck at bowling . Behold the BOWLERS of DESTINY!!!

Fred “the Philosopher” Tay
Aliases: The swallow, the Zen Master
School: Discipline Of the Timid Attack (DOTA)

“Fierce rock roll down path and crash at mountain, but mountain not move. Flowing water, sure and true, tumble mountain down eventually”
-old Chinese dude

Pag si tay tumira, everything is in slow motion, he holds the ball for a few seconds, taking his sweet time, then he calmly walks down the lane (step by agonizing slow step) and ever so gently lays the bowling ball into the ground. The bowling ball then rolls down at a snails pace and gently pushes the pins with the least amount of force possible. Kng nakakita ka ng nag ta tai-chi, ganun ka bagal ung movements ni Tay.

Mike “Lucky Spare” Domondon
Aliases: The Avatar of Excellence, The Definer of Coolness
School: Electronics and Communications of Bowling (6 Years)

“I’m ready! I’m Ready! I’m Ready –Eddy Yeddy!”

According to Tay and Kabo, puro chamba lng daw ung mga spare ko. Hahaha!!! I have to admit na tama sila. The times when I actually knocked the pins down are the times when I wasn’t actually thinking about knocking down any pins. When I concentrate on making the ball go straight, the blasted thing goes left or right (Stupid ball). But, when I think about other stuff, the chances of the ball going straight are higher. Case and point; I distinctly remember singing “Who lives in a pineapple under sea? Sponge Bob Square Pants!” in my head in one of my turns were I actually hit a strike. Pero kahit na puro chamba lng ako, 2nd higest namn ako! Ha! “Who ever said nobody remembers 2nd place?” I do Dammit!!!

Ryan “Gutter Ball” Chan
Aliases: Bowlzilla (Rawr!)
School: Nacho Libre School of Bowling

“The Eagle eggs were a lie! A lie!!! They give me no bowling powers! They give me no Nutrients!”

Kabo has two moves:
Ryan CRUSH!!! (D, DF, F +Punch Button)
-A powerful attack where kabo flails the bowling ball down the lane with all his might. Hit % of 25 percent. 75% Gutter Ball

Ryan SMASH!!! (D, DB, B + Punch Button)
-A more powerful attack than Ryan CRUSH!!! Follow up move to Ryan CRUSH!!! done in the next turn.
Hit % of 10 percent. 90% Gutter ball

*Both moves are done with a primal scream (Guh-Rahhhhhh!!!!)
**Ryan CRUSH!!! and Ryan SMASH!!! are the intellectual properties of Mark Frederick Tay

Tops “Bowling Master Boy” Yap
Aliases: Tops The Heavenly Ball, Yap Taicho (Captain)
School: self taught

“You must defeat Paeng Nepomuceno to stand a chance”

In actuality, si Tops lang naman talaga ang marunong mag bowling sa amin e. Sha lng ang may mad bowling skilz. Hustler ampota! Addict sa bowling! Almost every turn, strike or spare (Tops Zone!)! Tapos hindi pa sha satisfied sa score nya, kahit na tambak kami sobra! Yabang! Sipa nalng tayo! Or Patintero! Bring it!!!

Long Weekend

2006-08-21T12:33:00.000+08:00

Thank you Ninoy Aquino! Because of your sacrifice more than a decade ago, I, Mike the invincible man, get a reprieve from work today. As corrupt, poor, stagnant and virtually hopeless our country is today, your actions have at least brought a little joy into my life. In order to show my appreciation, I say “Screw You!” to those who say Ninoy was a communist.

Anyhow, this post is about how I spent my long weekend, mainly watching DVDs, so, this post is actually about the DVDs I watched and not about me, but its technically about me because a was the one doing the watching, ‘cause watching DVDs is what I did during the long weekend and since this post is entitled the Long Weekend, it is also about watching DVDs, which is what I did, so this post is also about what i did because I am MOOOOOJOOO JOJO!!!

Err…

Okay, now that I got that out of my system, I met some of my batch mates from college in metrowalk for a semi batch reunion sort of thing. We had dinner, a few drinks and we talked about stuff (Lui Agustin got married!! Whoa!!!). I had a blast although marami umalis ng maaga (can franz and avic, dulce and grace). Saka si jme hindi sumipot, inuna ung ADTX bago ung kanyang batch mates (sha pa namn isa sa nagyayaya)… tsk tsk.

Since I got home at around 1:30 in the morning, I woke up at around 1ish in the afternoon. I actually had my weekend planned, i ma marathon ko dapat ung season 1 ng Lost, which I borrowed from my officemate especially for the weekend. Well, I didn’t watch lost, instead I watched a couple of japanovellas (uhm, this word doesn’t sound right, so I’ll just use jap TV shows instead); Densha Otoko (Train Man) and Hana Yori Dango (Boys over flowers).

Densha Otoko

The show, is about an otaku (basically a Japanese male who loves anime, comics, video games and all related merchandise to the EXTREME)/loser who saves a beautiful girl from a drunk guy on a train. He of course falls for the girl but he has no idea whatsoever how to go about wooing said girl, he posts his story on an internet message board where various eccentric individuals help him in his task of improving his image and getting his love interest.

In most underdog love stories, the guy is a regular joe and the girl is a figurative goddess, in this series the guy isn’t even a regular joe, he’s total loser (the girl is still a goddess). Because of that, you can’t help getting behind him (everyone loves the underdog) in his quest to get a girl that is seemingly beyond his reach. This is where the show gets its good moments. But sometimes, the story gets so dragging (there are lot of scenes were they just show the guy talking to various people in the internet), you just want to kick his damn ass.

All in all, the show is okay. I wouldn’t recommend it to just anyone though. You should have at least a “little otaku in you” to appreciate it (pero di namn to the point na katulad nung guys depicted sa series, shit creepy sila).

Hana Yori Dango

Hana Yori Dango is based on a Japanese manga with the same name. Its about a poor girl who studies in a school for the extremely rich were she meets 4 guys, two of which she falls in loves with. Sounds familiar? Well it damn should. The manga Hana Yori Dango is also the basis for another show; Meteor Garden (if you haven’t at least heard of this show, you’re probably a hermit or something).

I can’t compare the shows ‘cause I never really got to watch Meteor Garden in full. I actually saw the first few episodes (during one of my summer breaks when it first aired), but I had to stop ‘cause I had summer classes (they showed it early afternoon I think). Then the show got sooooooo huge that even though they moved up the time slot, I didn’t bother watching ‘cause everyone was watching it already (I think I have masa-phobia). But even though I barely saw it, I know its basic story (You can’t help it, its like the Sixth Sense, even though you didn’t see the movie, the news that Bruce Willis was a ghost eventually reaches you), and I can say that its similar to Hana Yori Dango’s (except for the ending).

So which one is better? Uhm… I dunno. But if I had to pick I’d go for Hana Yori Dango, because Makino Tsukushi, the show’s Shan Cai (I don’t know the spelling, sorry kabo), is waaaaaaaayyyyyyy hotter than her meteor garden counterpart. She has the whole Japanese school girl thing going for her.

I recommend this show to fans of Meteor Garden. I’d love to hear their opinions, arguments or rants as to which show is actually superior.

Noir Art, Voyeurism and a Couple of Movies

2006-08-06T17:15:00.000+08:00

This is a three part post of three totally unrelated things. You’re probably gonna see a lot more of these types of posts because I rarely get the chance to update my blog.

Noir Art

A few days back, I saw this tutorial on the internet how to transform photos into graphic novel style art, like the ones you’d commonly find in the pages of Sin City. Sooooo… I decided to take a crack at it. Here’s what came out of it;

Can anyone guess where the quote came from? Haha.

Making this type of thing is relatively easy. It can be done in about thirty minutes. Wala kasi mashado work, pag manipulate lng ng layers, levels etc. Sisiw! Haha.

Voyeurism

Right next to the building where I work is a high-end condominium with an outdoor swimming pool. You know what that means right? Oh yeah! Babe watching baby! If you’re gonna tell me that I should be ashamed of myself, don’t bother. The guys from work have been doing it long before I started working there. So, like they say; When in Rome, do what the Romans do. But Ateneans want to do things better than anybody else! That’s why I brought erm… binoculars to work. Mwahahahahaha! (me washing my hands: hey di lng ako ung nagdala. Si Jm din. Hihihi).

Anyhoo, one day, this foreign girl in an uber mini two piece bikini (with leopard pattern design I might add) and some schmoe who I presume is her boyfriend decided to go for a dip. The girl was pretty hot, so I got my binoculars and started uhm appreciating God’s work. Usually when we “observe” all the girl does is swim and/or sun bathe. That day was different. They were in the Jacuzzi-like-thingy and they started getting, shall we say; dirty. The guy had his hands all over the babe (lucky stinking good for nothing rich idiotic piece of bird dropping bastard), literally feeling up her private places. And the girl was into it! Shit! She was like spreading her legs and wiggling her ass in the guy’s face (both while her crotch or her butt was about a foot away from the guy’s noggin’)! And you know what? I think she knew they were being watched! She kept glancing at the direction of our windows. The girl was working it for an audience! The little tease! Work stopped and mouths hung open for about an hour because of that very lewd but extremely entertaining display. The next day, before going into the building, I took a look at the windows. You definitely can see through it, which supports the theory that the girl knew she was being watched and it probably flipped her switch.

I need more powerful binoculars.

A Couple of movies
I saw a couple of movies in the last few days.

The first movie I saw was Miami Vice (with Tay, Kabo, Charles and Tops). It was crap. They had loads of scenes were Collin Farrell and Gong Lee (Hatsumomo from Memoirs of a Geisha) get in on. Good right? Nope. I’d like to classify “getting it on” in the movies into three categories. The first is the raunchy, torrid semi porn type (e.g. Basic Instinct). The second is the tastefully done type (usually for those love stories like the Note Book). Finally the third is the boring type where because of various reasons (I.e. no chemistry, poor characterization, bland camera shots etc.) you go “oh enough already, we get the idea! Pan to a shot of the wind blowing through some curtains or something!”

The second movie I watched was Click (with Xtiane, Jm and IC). The movie was ok. As with almost all of Adam Sandler’s movies (except Spanglish), I loved the soundtrack. 80’s music rulz man!!! The only thing I didn’t like was the ending. Why does Hollywood think that the “Everybody Lives Happily Ever After” is a necessity in feel good romantic comedies like Click? If it didn’t have the Hollywood Ending, the movie would have been better. Oh yeah, Kate Beckinsale was hot! She looks just as good in her Pocahontas outfit for this movie as her in that leather clad outfit in Underworld.

Now for some movie news…

The joker for the sequel for Batman Begins has been cast. The Joker is… Heathe “Brokebacker” Ledger. I think it’s a good choice. Hope the joker isn’t homo though. Haha.

Good news for all of you Sandman fans, Neil Gaiman has confirmed that a movie is going to be made and that he *gasp plans to direct it himself. The only reason I see for fans to be disappointed is that the movie is going to be based on the mini series “Death: The High Cost of Living” and not the actual Sandman graphic novels.

Mike’s 4 Steps in Dealing with Frustration

2006-08-03T19:15:00.000+08:00

Step 1: Sarcasm
I ride the MRT going to and coming home from work (dati going to work lang, but since nag resign na si LaC, wala na ako sasabayan every afternoon going home. Sad). Now, If you haven’t tried taking the train at around 7 in the morning or around 5 in the afternoon, you should. ‘Cause your missing a lot boys and girls! What fun it is to abandon all sense of decency to fight your way through the dreaded hordes in order to pack yourselves like sardines inside the train. And the aroma is just divine. Oh yes, the sweet heavenly smell of day old sweat clinging to the bodies of your fellow passengers is like aged wine to the senses. I urge everyone to give it a try.

Step 2: Ranting
To those of you who don’t know, the MRT adapted the system that the LRT1 uses. It reserves a car exclusively for female passengers. I’m cool with that (I’m not sexist). What I find annoying is how some of the female passengers insist on riding on the other cars even though one car is reserved just for them. Now if the other cars were relatively vacant I wouldn’t mind. But there I am trying with all my might to move my body away from some guy’s crotch when some woman tries to squeeze herself into the already packed car even though the car for women has tons of space! What’s with that dammit!? If the girl is with company, say her boyfriend or some friends, I, again, wouldn’t mind her in that part of the train (cause, cheesy as it may be, I don’t think its fair to separate people who don’t wanna be separated). But those loners, what reason do they have for making life difficult for all the passengers? Is that how they get their kicks? Or is it some perverse fetish perhaps? Whatever it is, damn them!!!

Step 3: Funny Anecdote
The train ride to work this morning was horrible as usual. The train was so packed that I thanked God for every station we passed, edging me closer to my stop; Ayala Station a.k.a. Sweet Freedom. When the train reached Ayala, I scrambled my way to the train’s doors (everyone scrambles, either you move fast or you get off on the next station) when somebody grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the door, hard! “What the hell is going on?!” I thought to myself. When I got out of the train, I saw that the person who was pulling my hand for dear life was some girl (not a pretty one if your curious). “Uhm…” I said making my presence known. The girl turns around, catches sight of me and says; “Ay…” It dawns on me she grabbed my hand by mistake. The hand she should’ve taken was…

I looked behind me and there he was. An orc in all his glory. He gave me his “hath-garesk-Shuk-bah” (translated from orc: “Insolent-human-I’m-gonna-rip-off-your-penis-and-stuff-it-down-your-throat) look. In response, I wanted to give him my “as-if-I-grabbed-her-hand-she-grabbed-mine-so-get-out-of-my-fuckin’-face-jabronie” look, but since he looked like an orc on steroids, I gave him my “erm-I-have-no-idea-what’s-happening” look. Apparently that was good enough for him. Phew.

Nagulat cguro ung girl when she realized she was holding the hand of a man-god instead of her sorry excuse for an orcfriend. Ahahahahahaha!!!!

Step 4: Song
When the fantasy has ended
And all the children are gone
There’s something good inside me
That helps me to carry on

I ate some bugs, I ate some grass
I used my hand, to wipe my tears
To kiss your mouth, I’d break my vows
No no no no no no way jose
Unless you want to, then we break our vows together

Encarnacion
Encarnacio –oh ho ho on
Encarnación (doobeedee doobeedee)
Encarnacio-oh ho ho on

Nachooooooo!!!!

2006-07-23T16:25:00.000+08:00

My blog is alive!!!

Wow, I’ts been a long time since I updated this blasted thing. I’m like soooooooo busy at work kasi e. You know?

-I wake up at 5 am, and eat soup (magi). I Love It!!

-Then I go to the office and stare at the computer all day. Wonderful!!

-Then, if I stay for a few more months, I will sit on my chair and read Specs and program in C for the REST of MY LIFE! Fantastic!

Anyhoo, lets get down to the “nitty gritty”. I watched Nacho Libre not once but twice! The first time, I was with Tay and Kabo. I have to say, almost from the start of the opening credits, to the ending credits, Everyone in the cinema was lauging their asses off. Except of course one person: yep you guessed it, Ryan Dennison “I-Don’t -Have-A Freakin’-Sense-Of-Humor” Chan. He hated the movie sooo much that by the end, when the rest of us smiling happy people were walking out of the theater in good spirits, Kabo was shouting “Crap!” “ That was the sorriest excuse for a movie EVER” etc. etc. etc. Well, ya know what? That made me enjoy the whole experience even more! Haha! Thanx Kabo.

I watched the movie the second time around with Xtiane and LaC. The movie was still damn funny! Buti nalng hindi "just my luck" pinanood namin. Shit Depressing un. Lalo na’t hindi na Fully Loaded si Lindsay Lohan… What’s the point? Haha.

All in all, watching the movie twice was worth my monies. Until next time.

xxooXxOox

If I were… No. 2

2006-05-20T18:45:00.000+08:00

I few months back, I posted the predecessor of this post. To refresh everyone’s memory, the theme of the post was screwing the tests we commonly see on different blogs (“What color are you”, “What kind of lover are you etc etc…) and taking hold of your own destiny by making up your own damn results. With out further bullshit, let’s move onward!

If I were a character in One Tree Hill

I would be Peyton Sawyer! Tada! Not only is she the resident artist of the show (like me in real life), she’s also totally hot (like me in real life). ‘nuf said.

Pero in all honesty, mas magaling ako mag drawing sa kanya, plus iba kami ng artistic preference. I’m not into feeling-profound-shit like she is. Plus I’m not moody and I’m past the whole I-have-a-screwed-up-family-and-no-one-understands-me phase of my life. Pero in fairness, kahit na masmagaling ako magdrawing, mas hot siya sakin (pero onti lng).

I know you guys are thinking “Mike, pohta babae yan pinili mong character! Are you drugs!? Ok ka lng!?” To that I say, “Who else should I choose?” I can’t pick Nathan or Lucas Scott kasi Lord knows I totally suck at basketball (yes, you heard right people I beat at basketball, the only reason some people lose to me is because they suck more at the game than I do). Actually there’s one character na pipiliin ko dapat. There’s this obscure character named Tim (ung sobra tactless guy na best friend ni Nathan), but wala ko mahanp na picture nya sa net. Obscure talaga. Haha. Kaya I ended up with Peyton Sawyer.

If I were a girl

I’ve been reading some of Jme’s recent blog posts, according to those posts, some of her relatives said that we look a like (kind of like Conan O Brien and the president of Finland or some other country).

To that “accusation” I say that most of the time, relatives think you are more attractive than you really are. XD

Bwahahaha!!!

Pero wag ka magalit Jme, maganda ka naman e. Kaya lang pag naging babae ako, mas hot ako sayo! Thus, If I were a girl I’d be…

Elisha Cuthbert.

And oh yeah, If I were a girl I’d be a lesbian, I’d totally hang out with other hot girls and make out and do other wonderful stuff hot lesbians do.

Finally, If I were an American Idol Contestant

I’m guessing most of you are familiar with Ace. How about Chris or Taylor? Well, they’re morons! Losers and peons all of them! Bah! (In my best Simon Cowell Impression) In fact all of them are absolutely horrible that I’m not gonna choose from their ranks. Instead, I would rather be our very own Pinoy pop super star….

Mark Bautista

Pucha, wala naman cnabi yang mga American Idol nay an kay Lastikman! Tignan nyo namn, nagpapa macho pa o. Naaalala ko tuloy ung kalakasan ni George Estregan. Hahahahaha! Cool pa ung song nya:

Song Post #4
You win the game
You have no shame!
And I’m always gonna love you more!!!!

Sobra astig to dapat ito ung entrance music ni “The Game” Triple HHH sa WWE.
Panalo yun.

Alias the Movie

2006-05-05T20:32:00.000+08:00

I watched Mission: Impossible 3 last Wednesday (opening day! Weeeee!). After work, JM, LaC and I went to Market Market to catch Mr. Katie Holmes in action. Though I was already pooped, I didn’t mind watching the movie ‘cause I was pretty hyped about the flick.

I thought the movie was going back to its roots. M:I 2 should have been okay by me. The only problem was that it was a Mission Impossible movie. Now, I’m one of those guys who think John Woo movies are cool, but Mission: Impossible is not about a double berretta wielding, one man army who loves to spin in slow mo amidst a flock of pigeons taking flight. It was always about a team of talented people who specialized in different aspects of espionage (disguise, computer systems, automobiles etc.) coming together to pull off a mission that is well… impossible.

As I said, I expected Mission: Impossible to go back to its roots. M:I 3 was helmed by JJ Abrams, the guy who created the TV series Alias. I thought: “this guy should now what he’s doing", he created a series about agents, double agents and terrorist organizations that is currently in its fifth season. I thought he was damn qualified to direct Mission Impossible 3. The repercussions of having this guy as its director only hit me about 30 minutes or so into the movie.

Like my title states, Mission: Impossible 3 is Alias the movie. Apparently, Abrams used up all his ideas in the five seasons of Alias, cause he didn’t come up with anything new for this movie. Abrams used every plot device found in Alias for M: I 3! Here are some examples:

The Pacing
Like a number of episodes of Alias, M:I 3 starts off with the protagonist (Ethan Hunt) tied to a chair (beaten and bruised), being interrogated by the bad guy. Again, like it always happens in Alias, the movie then backtracks several hours and shows you step by step how the good guy got into that predicament. It shows this by making Ethan Hunt go through a couple of mission briefings where he argues with the boss, has some comical conversation with the tech guy, he has some lovey-dovey sequences here and there, it then has agent Hunt run around various locales around the globe. Eventually, Ethan Hunt allows his ass to get caught, then we wind up where the movie starts off. When it gets back to this point, just like Sydney Bristow before him, Ethan Hunt escapes, whips the bad guy’s butt and saves the day. Tah-Dah!!!

The Secret Weapon
Alias has those mysterious Rambaldi devices. M:I 3 has the “Anti-God”/Rabbit’s foot. A weapon that is apparently so god-damned powerful that it can wipe out anything and everything from the face of the earth. Just like the Rambaldi device, what the Anti-God actually is wasn’t explained.

Spy Meetings
Just like Sydney Bristow and her handler Michael Vaughn, Ethan Hunt apparently loves meeting with his handler in inconspicuous locations like Seven Eleven convenience stores.

Code Names
M:I 3 uses the codename Phoenix in one of the black ops depicted (Phoenix is a codename used by Jennifer Garner’s character).

Cameos
If that wasn’t enough, the guy who plays Eric Wise on Alias (the fat guy who‘s bein partnered with Sydney’s sister Nadia) does a cameo, hell even the girl who plays Felicity on Felicity (another television series created by JJ Abrams) has a role in M:I 3.

Finally, just like Alias, the movie has an anti climactic ending. After all the great stunts and explosions in the beginning and in the middle of the movie, the ending was a major let down. Alias always gets a chance to redeem itself ‘cause there always is a next episode. Obviously, M:I 3 doesn’t have that luxury.

Off course the movie had its good points. Here’s 2 of them; Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Maggie Q. Hoffman played the sadistic badass to the T. Maggie Q was hot, plain and simple.

The movie was so identical to Alias in so many levels that in the end, I half-expected Tom Cruise to rip his face off to reveal Jennifer Garner.

In conclusion, JJ Abrams wasn’t the man for the job. In retrospect, they should have gotten some one like Michael Bay (Bad Boys 2, The Island) to direct M:I 3. The guy who directed the Bourne movies would have done a good job too… I think.

2 Weeks with the Man

2006-04-28T19:52:00.000+08:00

Last April 17, I closed a chapter in my life by starting work. I kissed the bum life goodbye, donned my worker bee costume and became part of the hive that is bitmicro. In this post, I’d like to share some of the stuff about my first two weeks of being a cubicle worker. Before I proceed, I beg you, please don’t expect a coherent train of thought (as if my previous posts had one… ha!), or any semblance of a main idea. Instead, brace yourself for a good helping of rants and ramblings.

-Question #1: Ano ba talaga work ko?
Some of my friends asked me this before I started working. The answer I always gave was that I’d be a programmer that programs solid state memory storage devices. But I didn’t even know what the f*ck a solid state memory device is. Now I do. Basically it’s a hard disk that has a series of flash memory devices instead of a rotating disk. I write programs for those things. So there (pero ngayon, di pa ko marunong… but knowing is half the battle ryt?).

-Question #2: San ung work ko?
The place I work in is located at the 11th floor of the Net 1 center in the fort. Saying that I’m a cubicle worker is not exactly true. That’s because I don’t have my own cubicle. I have a work station. The place looks more like a computer laboratory than an office. Para lang ako nasa Computer lab sa Ateneo. Depressing. Well, at least I have my own PC... (Pero lilipat daw sa Net 1 Plaza by September, sana may cubicles na)

-Rant #1: Intranet
Though I have my own PC, the damn thing doesn’t have an internet connection. Because of that I can’t waste company time on YM, fantasy NBA, or blogging like charles does. All I have is collabrix (para shang YM na LAN lng). Du’n kami nag gagaguhan nila JM and LaC (oh yeah, office mates ko cla, kya lng c LaC sa ibang floor na assign). Kahit two seats away lang c JM, nag co collabrix pa kami. Hahahaha!

-Rant #2: The Mystery of the Dying Cellphone
Another thing na nakaka asar is that cellphones aren’t allowed in your work station (para daw di I divulge ang company secrets), you have to leave it in a shelf near the guard. Every time you wanna use your phone, you have to get up and go to a designated area. Okay lang sana sa akin, but my damn phone is a piece of crap. For some reason, every time I leave it on the shelf, the damn thing powers off. It doesn’t matter if it’s fully charged or not, my phone just dies. But when I take it away from the shelf (during lunch breaks or when I go home), the blasted thing works fine. I think it doesn’t like being around lots of cell phones, why? I dunno. Radiation? EM fields maybe? Email ko kaya si sir Libatique to find out?

-Rant #3: I want Money, lots and lots of Money...
Today is April 28, 2006. Everybody got paid today. Except for the new guys (which includes me)!!! It seems that sa May 15 pa ang first pay check namin ‘cause alanganin pa daw ang number of work days namin. And I thought that I was going to be able to swim in a vault full of money like Mr. Scrooge from “Ducktales” tonight. Depressing!

-Nerdness lv up
********
mike lv 30
********
int +13
dex -11
AGI -10
*******
learned new skill: "C Programming!"

I had to relearn C programming ‘cause I forgot how (And the stuff I forgot was not much to begin with XD). I had to become one with the pointers, structures, linked lists etc. I was so into it that one day, while reading a book on C programming, the author made a joke that went something like:

#include

#define { begin:
#define } end:

main()
begin:
printf(“Hello World\n”);
end:

I caught myself laughing at the joke… Shit ang nerd ko na.

-Fun with Mike and Friends entry #11
Cast: JM and LaC

Like I said earlier, nag co collabrix kaming tatlo lagi. Now, collabrix has this feature that allows you to “broadcast a message” (think SMS using PCs). While working, I suddenly received a message from JM (which he broadcasted to me and LaC) that read:

“NATATAE AKO!!”

Like I said, nag gagaguhan kami lagi, so I paid no attention to it. After a while LaC changed her online status to “Do not Disturb”. Her status was like that for about half an hour (napaisip tuloy ako: “wow, seryoso sa work sobra c lac”). When her status went back to “available” I asked her why she didn’t want to be disturbed. Apparently, her boss was using her PC when out of the blue:

Broadcast Message from JM Lukban:

“NATATAE AKO!!!”

Hahahahaha!!! It gets better, her seatmates happened to read the message and it spread like wildfire that some guy from the 11th floor named JM Lukban broadcasted that he wanted to take a shit.

That’s it for now… dami ko pa gusto sabihin kaya lang bawal mag divulge ng company stuff eh. Baka makulong ako XD.

The Story that Just Won’t Die

2006-04-06T23:39:00.000+08:00

I’m talking about my encounter with Epok Quimpo sa Manang’s during my 2nd year in the Ateneo. Now, if you know me, (you most probably do since you’re reading my uber cool blog) you’ve most definitely heard the story AT LEAST once. Because of this and because I already documented the unfortunate incident in a previous post (Check: Mike the Embarassing Man), I won’t go into the story anymore. Instead I’m writing about something related to it.

Like the title states, the story just won’t die. I had dinner with Charles, Tay, Kabo and Darn last Saturday. During the usual boisterous banter that goes on when we get together, Darn brings up the usual story. But this time he added something new to the mythos (mythos ampota, para ng legend to a).

Now Darn is somehow acquainted to another Ateneo Blue Eagle; Magnum Membrere. How close are they you ask? Well, I don’t know (pero di naman cguro sila Broke Backers). Anyways, habang nag uusap si Darn and si Magnum, the story came up (I forgot who brought up the story though). But yung nakakagulat is that alam ni Magnum ung story!!! Apparently kinuwento ni Quimpo sa teammates nya na may mga Atenistang gusto sha I-trade! When I think about Epok Quimpo telling his teammates about the incident, I can’t help but shudder a little. Pucha, isipin nyo naman kung sino teammates nya nung time na yun! Villanueva, Alvarez, Fonacier, Tenorio, Bugia, Membrere… sama mo pa si Chia. Sila yung 2002 UAAP champions boys and girls. According to Membrere, pinagtawanan daw nila sobra si Epok, pero akala nila narinig lang ni Epok un kung saan saan. Chismis kumbaga. Little did they know that two jerks said it to his face! Mwahahahaha!

It’s a good thing Darn set the record straight for Magnum that it was Darn and me who unintentionally hurt the poor guy’s feelings. Sigh… The story has to be accurate dammit! The story will be passed on from 1 generation to another! It is the Legacy I leave to the Ateneo. Valedictorians, Summas, Magnas or whatever, they come and go…

The Epok-for-Cortez Story will on live forever!!! Bwahahahahah!!! Okay… probably not forever. Okay na sakin mga a few more months.

Who do I find at the End of My Road? Chuck Norris That’s Who

2006-03-26T20:35:00.000+08:00

I woke up this afternoon with a hangover thanks to Xtiane’s graduation celebration last night. While I was lying on my bed, I realized what I didn’t appreciate when school ended, or when I walked up the stage to shake Father Nebres’ hand during the commencement exercises. It dawned on me that it WAS over. I also realized that I can be such a hypocrite (or a lying sack of shit if you prefer) sometimes. I always told anyone who would listen to me for 2 seconds that I couldn’t wait to graduate, that I couldn’t wait to finally haul my ass out of the Ateneo after 6 long years. But I didn’t feel any satisfaction at that moment, lying on my bed realizing I’ve come to the end of a proverbial road. Shit, I didn’t even feel relief. What I felt, cheesy as it may sound, was this big black empty hole inside my chest. I finally graduated and I can honestly say that I am going to miss going to Ateneo. I’m going to miss CTC 208, the caf, even the shitty excuse for a building that is Faura. But what I am really gonna miss are the people (shit ang cheesy to the max na nito ah) who one way or another, made my life interesting (friends, classmates, teachers, the pretty girls with mini skirts, even the doobie guys who chill along the SEC walkway). I probably won’t see most of them for a very long time. I made some great friends during the last six years, and we probably are going to keep in touch (sana naman! Walang kalimutan mga peeps!), but we no longer are going to hang out in school, eat lunch in the caf or buy cheese dog sandwiches in the “Satellite Caf” (kahit na nagkikita kita ang mga friends, iba parin ung nag ha hang out sa school). Thinking about being unable to do the things I took for granted for so long makes me feel like crap.

Shit! This is the first and last time I’m going to admit it. I am going to miss the Ateneo; Saying that I hated my stay is a load of bullshit. I’m going to miss my friends. I loved and hated graduation day at the same time. I enjoyed every hot, humid second of it. If I were given the chance to live my college life again I would (sans the tests, oral exams and hell weeks kung pwede. Ha-ha).

-----------------------------

Okaaay. Tama na cheesy stuff. Bring in some funnies!!! After feeling mildly depressed, I picked myself up and decided to surf the net. A friend of mine recently told me about Chuck Norris jokes circulating around the net (blogs, forums email etc.). He said that the jokes were really funny. So I decided to check them out. I googled “Chuck Norris Jokes” and found the most comprehensive site and started reading. Were they funny? Let’s just say that after the 6th or 7th joke, tears were literary falling from my eyes because of hysterical laughter. I’m gonna post some of them below (sobra tip of the ice berg mga ‘to, sobra dami e). Before reading, I advice that you read not just one, but a lot of them because these jokes are like beer; hinde pwede isang inom lang, kelangan uminom ka ng marami para masarapan ka.

Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke
the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while
she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck
Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have
a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in
every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the **** out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill.

Chuck Norris ruins the endings of Harry Potter books for children who just
bought one for the hell of it. When they start crying Chuck Norris calmly
says, "I'll give you something to cry about," and roundhouse kicks them in
the face.

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked
her into a glacier.

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift
of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen,
jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined
influence
to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of
roundhouse kick related deaths.

Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is
injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt
to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck
said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came
back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he
threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with
cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her
a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are
trademarked names for his left and right legs.

There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.

Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

if you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.

A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

Okay ba? I know the jokes are not for everyone. But I think people who at least have an inkling as to whom Chuck Norris is will find them funny. if you wanna check out more Chuck Norris Fun, check this site:
http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com

Fun with Mike and Friends

2006-03-20T10:57:00.000+08:00

I’ve posted a few stories about myself on this blog. Most of them (if not all of them) are about me making a fool of myself. I don’t know why, time and again I get myself in those kinds of situations where I make myself look like a damn fool. Maybe because I enjoy telling everyone else about it afterwards haha!!! Or… maybe I just talk too much. Whatever.

In any case, this post is gonna be different. It’s not just gonna be about me. This post is my list of the 10 funniest stories (na di ko pa na post, until now that is) that me and my friends were part of. What’s different is that most of these stories are funny NOT because of me, but because of THEM. Why am I posting them? I guess its time to give credit where credit is due. I can’t be the only fount of funniness now can I? So, here it goes (the list is in chronological order by the way):

1. Oooooh! Lookie! A White Board Marker!
Cast: Mike, Joem and Mesi
-Once upon a time in High School, Joem, Mesi and I where at National Book Store (why we were there, I can’t remember), when we saw a Marker next to a White Board. Being the uber talented artists that we were, we took the marker and started doodling all over the white board. If a marker’s next to a white board, it has to be a white board marker right? Nuh-uh. One of those NBS guys spotted us and figured we were juveniles who get a kick out of writing “I was Here” on whiteboards using permanent ink. He wanted us to pay for the blasted thing. We didn’t have enough cash. Bottomline, Joem bought a bottle of alcohol, which we used to clean up our mess.

2. ES 10. First Class
Cast: Mike and the Chinese Mafia (sans Tay and Kabo)
-During my first year in college, I took Environmental Science 10 with mah peeps. During the first day of class, the teacher asked us “Why we chose ES 10 as our Nat. Sci. subject. Our classmates gave the BS answers (“I want to learn about the environment blah blah blah yackity schmackity”) When it was my turn to speak, I said:

Mike:Ma’am, nagenroll ako sa ES kasi sabi ni Stan, pag hindi daw ako nag ES ‘di na kami magkaibigan.

Darn, Charles and Yerx said the same thing. We made Stan out to be some posse’s big cheese. Haha. Apparently the teacher bought it. She probably thought that if stan could control loud mouths like us (not to mention ang lalaking mama ni darn and charles), he must be a bully.

3. ES 10 Filmviewing
Cast: Mike and Darn
-Darn and some guys cut some of their classes to watch a Joyce Jimenez movie (Big pa dati si Joyce XD). We met up during our ES class and I asked them:

Mike:O, kamusta ung movie?
Darn: Pangit! ‘di ako na-satisfy

Apparently, he wasn’t satisfied kasi wala mashado shots ng boobies ni Joyce Jimenez. It just so happened that we were going to watch a movie in class too. It was about saving the rain forest or something (kalimutan ko na ung title). One of the scenes from the movie showed some natives. These natives where the I-don’t-care-if-my-boobies-are-showing type of natives. With a voice just loud enough for EVERYONE to hear, I said:

Mike: O, yan Darn! Satisfied ka na ba!?

Everyone laughed. Si Darn namula na parang kamatis! Hehe.

4. Atras Mo! Atras Mo!
Cast: Mike and JC
-JC, Stan and I were walking along Father Masterson’s Drive coming from Katipunan (sa may gate 3). While crossing the street, this car came speeding towards us. He stopped just in time to plant one his wheels on JC’s foot. After a few seconds, the guy rolls down his window, looks JC, whose face was contorted in agony, up and down and asks:

Man: Okay ka lang
JC: (answering back in obvious frustration and agony) Atras Mo! Atras Mo!

5. Para Mama!
Cast: Mike and Lana
-I left martin’s birthday party, where I got extremely drunk, with Lana. We ended up waiting for taxis along katipunan when I saw headlights which I figured belonged to a taxi. I flagged the vehicle down while trying my best not to fall flat on my face on the side of the road when:

Lana: Mike, ba’t mo pina-para ung truck?
Mike: (incoherent mumbling).

The truck passes by. Oops. Could’ve sworn it was a cab.
Oh yeah. On my way home, I puked myself silly on the back of the cab I was riding.

6. Spirit of the Glass
Cast: Mike and Xtiane
-During one of our drinking sessions in JM’s house, he coerced us to play spirit of the glass. Since it was his house, I reluctantly agreed. If there was one word to describe spirit of the glass, it would be “Bullox”. The damn glass moves because one person or another makes it move (on purpose or not). Xtiane proved me right. We all had our eyes closed and we had our fingertips on the glass that was supposed to move. After a few moments:

Xtiane: (with her eyes closed) O, gumagalaw na ung glass!

I opened my eyes

Mike: Eh hindi mo naman hawak ung glass eh!

She was moving her hand this way and that while the glass was sitting idly on the board. XD

7. Steamed Sashimi
Cast: Mike, Tay and the rest of the gang
-After watching a movie, the gang and I decided to have dinner. We ate in this obscure Japanese place in glorietta. We all ordered the same thing, a bento meal that had rice, tempura (I think) and sashimi. Apparently, Tay doesn’t do raw fish. He calls the waitress and says:

Tay: Uh miss, pwede ba ipaluto ‘to?

The waitress was like “what the hell?!” The rest of us laughed throughout the meal. Oh yeah, they didn’t cook his sashimi. Apparently, they don’t accept requests from customers to have their sashimi steamed, fried or whatever.

8. If we hold on Together…
Cast: Mike LaC and Loza
-I went with LaC and friends to this resort in Batangas. While we were swimming in the pool, they all decided rather spontaneously to hold hands and walk to the deep and of the pool singing “If we hold on together” (the land before time theme) to show faith and trust that we wouldn’t let each other drown. LaC and Loza can’t swim. Talk about trusting in your friends right? Wrong.

Everyone: If we hold on… together. I know our dreams will never die…

We weren’t even close to the deep end when the two of them (LaC and Loza) broke formation and fought over a rubber ball like two crazed lunatics to serve as a make shift life saver.

9. Richard Reynoso
Cast: Mike and Richard
-After watching Sin City at Shangrila, Richard and I were chillin’ watching the rest of the people exit the theater when we saw none other than Ding Dong Avanzado and Jessa Zaragosa.

Richard: (in a loud mocking voice) Mike! Mike! SI RICHARD REYNOSO!! (he then starts to sing) Hindi ko kaya, ang Limutin Kita! Masdan mo, lumuluha ang aking mga mata!

Being the good friend that I am, I laugh my ass off! Dunno if they heard us, but it was damn funny!

10. Atenista ‘To!
Cast: Mike and Edson
-Edson and I were with another OJT doing MMS tests in a Mc Donald’s in SM Ayala. The OJT, Princess was an ECE student from UST, and boy was she pretty. Sha ung tipo na maganda tapos alam nya maganda sha, pero in a good way. She doesn’t come off as stuck up, mayabang or anything. She’s real nice. Anyways, naglolokohan kami sa Mc Donald’s.

Princess: Edson, libre mo naman ako ng French fries.
Edson: Wala ako pera eh.
Princess: Mike, libre mo naman ako ng French fries.
Mike: Siguro, sa UST, pag sinabi mo sa isang guy na ilibre ka ng French fries, mabilis pa sa umaga. Ililibre ka nya no?
Princess: Oo naman.
Mike: Pwes, ibahin mo kami! Atenista mga ‘to! Di porke’t maganda ka ililibre ka namin ng French fries. Iba ‘toh!!!

Oi, pero, naglolokohan lang kami nun ha. Wala seryosohan. Haha! :D

------------------------

So there! Props to my friends for making my life interesting!

Graduation Stuff Circa 2004

2006-03-15T21:55:00.000+08:00

I was browsing through some of my stuff this afternoon, looking through old books, drawings and other personal belongings when I came upon my yearbook stuff when I got one during my fourth year of college (kahit na 2 more years pa bago ako actually mag graduate XD haha). I found my yearbook write up, my gradpic and my creative pic. Since my actual graduation is just around the corner, I’m posting my graduation stuff here.

Write-Up

If there’s one person you should know in your stay in the Ateneo, its Mike. I mean, he’s so cool kaya. He’s got it all, the smarts, insurmountable artistic talent and dashing good looks. Not to mention he’s so kind and merciful too! I remember one time someone was making asar him for spending 6 years in college, instead of beating him up with his mad kung fu skillz, he just let it slide. I asked him why, and you know what he said? He said “I believe that the first test of a truly great man is his humility. Really great men have a curious feeling that the greatness is not in them but through them. And they see something divine in every other man and are endlessly, incredibly merciful” I was like so amazed. Mike changed my life so much that I gave myself to him body and soul. I am his devout servant, I worship the very ground he walks on. Mike is so galling that he was voted “Person most likely to establish his own country”. Long live Mike!!!

Ahem… So here’s my gradpic:

I was so pissed with this photo ‘cause I forgot to shave.

Here’s my creative pic:

Guess who I am? To give you guys a hint, I’m a character from Greek mythology

Ahhh… looking through my write-up and pictures sure brought back a lot of memories (snif).

Saguijo

2006-03-12T11:50:00.000+08:00

I went to Saguijo last night with some of my friends (Jm, Martin and Xtiane). Kaya di ako nakasama kina Tay manood ng Fearless. Haha. Besides, I already watched the flick, and since I can safely assume that they watched it too, I can go ahead and say that Jet Li kicks the bucket (sobra cliché pa, how do you kill mega kung-fu man? Poison of course! Man don’t they ever learn?).

Anyhoo back to Saguijo, to those who don’t know what the heck Saguijo is, it’s this old decrepit building (I think house is a better word) hidden amongst the hustle and bustle of the Makati Business District where OPM bands play their music. Is it me or do OPM bands tend to congregate in places that look like God forsaken hell holes? Why can’t they play in snazzier places (but if they did, malamang mas mahal ung entrance fee, so…) like the Manila Hotel, or Edsa Shang (imagine, orange and lemons kicking it, in Edsa Shang… Nyahahahaha!)?

There where a lot of bands that night that I didn’t even know existed, but there where a couple that I at least heard about, namely; Urbandub, Chicosci and Stonefree. I should probably mention that though I have heard of Urbandub and Chicosci, I couldn’t tell you what songs they play and how they look like. That’s why when the opening band was setting up, I turned to Martin and asked him in all seriousness;

“Sikat ba yan?”

He thought that nangagago lang ako so naki ride naman sha; “Oo, sikat yan!” It seems that Saguijo wanted to start things off big, ‘cause the band I was asking about was Urbandub. Haha! Kakahiya naman ako, sana wala ibang nakarinig sa akin. So it went like this, when a new band would start setting up, itatanong ko lagi “sikat bay yan?” Eventually na realize din ni Martin na di ako nangagago hahahaha!!

Aside from that, another embarrassing thing happened to me while I was there ‘cause of my big mouth. Jm met some of his friends there, and he introduced us to this girl (who was kinda cute). Anyway, I heard that a band was going to play called “Narda”. I found this funny so I started blurting out;

“Narda?! Diba Kamikaze un!? Request tayo sa Narda na kumanta ng Narda! Wahahaha!!!”

Little did I know that the frontman of Narda was a frontwoman; the girl who Jm introduced to us, who was in close proximity to me when I was flapping my gums and making a fool of myself. Shit. Stupid Jm... should have said something dammit. After they played, the frontwoman came up to Jm and said that they were going already. Before she left she said to us:

“Guys, thanks for coming, kahit alam ko naman na hindi kami ang pinunta nyo dito…”

I hope she didn’t say this because she overheard my stupid comments. Buti nalng nakainom nako, may palusot ako as to why I was bright red. XD

After a few more bands, Chicosci hit the stage. If I could think of one word to describe them, it would be:

Angas

Pota, lupit pala ng band na to! And to think Ateneo band pala sila dati and ngayon ko lang sila narinig. Angas nung frontman! He really reminded me of those Japanese rockstars I see on animax. It was his look (anime hair, eye shadow, and he was wearing this glove-like-thing that stretched to his fore arm), muka talaga hapon. He reminded me of the frontman ng larc en ciel (Japanese band):

I wasn’t going to be surprised kung tumugtog bigla ung guitar riff ng Driver’s High and kinanta nya bigla ung GTO theme song. Haha! Anyways, they did something better, nag cover sila ng OPM song:

Lagi nalang umuulan
Parang wala katapusan
Jan jan jan jan.....
Blah Blah Blah

…….

La la la la la la laaaaaaahhh!!!
Tuwing Umuulaaaaan!!!

Bwahahahaha!!! Eto talaga ung nag steal ng show for me!! Chicoshe Rox!!! Woooo Hoooo!!!! Hindi na Sponge Cola fave Ateneo band ko! Bwahahahaha!!!

After a couple of bands, tumugtog narin ung stonefree, ung pinakahihintay ng stonefuh-reak ng group namin (haha, cno kaya un!? Hmmm… :D). I always thought that stonefree performed well live. Pero n’ labo, iniba iba nila ung songs na tinugtog nila, they changed the beat, tune and even the lyrics. They even inserted some verses from the song "Time after time" ("if you fall I will catch you... blah blah, time after time") It was like Stonefree: The Remix. In my opinion, the only musicians who have the license to remix their own songs are the ones who really make it big. This begs the question:

“Sikat ba yan?”

Haha!

And the Answer Is...

2006-03-07T21:58:00.000+08:00

Keira Knightley!!!

Congratulations to Jamie Zamodio for proving my mad photoshop skillz...
Email mo ung pic mo and i photoshop ko...

Conditions for the Prize
1. Dapat i post mo sa blog mo (advertising hihihi), and dapat sabihin mo ako gumawa nyahahaha!!

2. Dapat me caption: "gawa ni mike na mas magaling kay elbert sa lahat ng bagay, lalo na sa pag drawing". nyahahahaha!!!

Thanks to Tay for his constructive criticism (bah)
No thanks to the know-it-all, kabo, for bashing my fantastiglorious work. malamang inggit lang yan, kasi sha, di nya kaya gumawa ng ganyan. bleh!!!

Guess Who!

2006-03-04T17:37:00.000+08:00

i've been playing around with adobe photoshop a lot again lately. I made some more "toons" of real people. Here's one of them:

So... in order to test my mad photoshop skillz, i'd like to know how many people actually recognize the person whose picture i messed around with. Sort of a contest, who guesses the right person wins! Yipeeeee (oi JM, di ka pwede sumali XD)!!! Who ever wins gets a priceless prize (priceless prize! haha!) courtesy of the Republic of Michaelandia!

My Favorite Movie Lines

2006-02-21T10:41:00.000+08:00

Here are some of my favorite movie lines, sadly they are all from american movies. Why? I dunno, probably becuase I don't watch to many Filipino movies. I watch a lot of asian movies (Japanese, Chinese and Korean), but I don't remember any of their lines (probably because i don't speak japanese, Chinese or Korean haha. In any case, here they are (in particular order);

-"Bad guy falls in poop: Classic element of physical comedy. Now comes
the part where we throw our heads back and laugh. Ready?
Guides: Ready! Hahahahahaha!" George of the Jungle

-"Take that you Evil Spawn of Satan! Ace Ventura 2"

-"Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape." Planet of the
Apes

-"I feel the need- the need for speed!" Top Gun

-"I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!" The Wizard of Oz

-"Say 'hello' to my little friend!" Scarface

-"In this life, I only have my balls and my word- and I don't break them for nobody" Scarface

-"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." The Godfather: Part
II

-"You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do
ya, punk?" Dirty Harry

-"If you build it, they will come." Field of Dreams

-"You can't handle the truth!" A Few Good Men

-"Thank you for playing "Should we or should we not follow the advice of
the galactically stupid!" A Few Good Men

-"Love means never having to say you're sorry." Love Story

-"May the Force be with you." Star Wars

-"I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse." The Godfather

-"Arise! Arise, Riders of ThÈoden. Spears shall be shaken, shields shall
be splintered! A sword day... a red day... ere the sun rises!!" Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

-"You hear that Mr. Anderson?... That is the sound of inevitability... It
is the sound of your death... Goodbye, Mr. Anderson... " The Matrix

-"No...Not without incident." Equilibrium

-"Yes, I've heard. Kills men by the hundreds. And if HE were here, he'd
consume the English with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning
from his arse." Braveheart

-"Whatever life holds in store for me, I will never forget these words:
"With great power comes great responsibility." This is my gift, my
curse. Who am I? I'm Spiderman." Spiderman

-"It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me." Batman Begins

-"I belong to the warrior in whom the old ways are borne anew" The Last Samurai

-"Are you not entertained!?" Gladiator

Bum No More?

2006-02-09T19:56:00.000+08:00

For the last couple of weeks, I did everything in my power in order to ensure that I, Mike the Invincible Man would have a job waiting for me by the time I finally graduate from the god forsaken hell hole that is the Ateneo. For the last couple of weeks, I;

Went to three Job fairs (Ateneo, U.P. and a job fair sponsored by the PLDT group of companies in Megamall).

Applied for jobs in about 10 or so companies (Accenture, AdTx, BitMicro, Panasonic, Samsung, HP, Fujitsu, PLDT, etc.)

Took two employment exams so far (Accenture and AdTx)

Went to 1 interview (BitMicro)

Phew…

So, what do I have to show for it?

Accenture
I arrived late for this test (thanx to JM being super late), so we had to go to another venue for the test (no big). The exam was ok. Standard stuff. Nakakaasar lang ung proctor! Sobra Bitch!

Mike: Excuse me, what if I’m not interested in the technical support job (aka call center); do I need to fill up this form?

Proctor: Kung di ka interested e di wag mo sagutan.

Whoa… what the hell did she have up her huge butt!? Stupid hag.

Tapos humihingi pa sha ng resume and transcript, kahit sinabi ko na nag pass na ko ng resume and transcript nung job fair. The stupid bitch still adamantly insisted that I pass a resume and transcript or fax it to some number later. What the hell for!? Fuck it! Hindi na ko magpapasa!!

After the test, which took forever (dami test ampota), JM and I went to Glorietta to catch a movie with IC. We didn’t know it at the time but we were about to watch the sorriest excuse for a motion picture created in recent memory: Blood Rayne (buti nalng linibre kami ni IC sa movie). I’d tell you how much it sucked, but I’d be straying from the theme of my post.

Anyways, my current status with accenture is unknown. Di pa nila ko tinatawagan. Di namn cguro ako bumagsak sa test, baka kasi di ako nag pass uli ng resume. Stupid.

AdTx
Muntik nanaman ako ma late for another employment exam (again thanks to the very slow and tardy JM Lukban). Good thing we made it on time. The test was ok (parang ung accenture test pero mas mahirap ng onti).

But unlike Accenture, tinawagan na ko ng AdTx. I passed!!! Woohooo!!! I have an interview next Monday. Sana Ok (still don’t know the base pay, benefits etc.)!!

BitMicro
This company didn’t even bother with an employment test. They went straight to the interviews. I went through 3 interviews; 1 with HR, 1 with the Head of Engineering and 1 with the CEO of the company. The interviews went ok. Sort of.

They offered me a job.

Wtf!? I was so excited! I was being offered a job for the very first time! Okay, it was more like “we are considering you for the job, call us back if you’re interested” but still! The CEO gave me two days to think about it. It was a good thing he did, the moment I left their office, all the down sides of the offer dawned on me. Here’s the down side;

-The contract is for 4 freakin’ years
-Work hours are from 7am to 7pm!?

Can anyone say Legalized Slavery!?

So wanna know what happened? I called after 3 days instead of 2 (para defiant ung dating ko haha). I told them I was interested. Hey, I figured they’d give me at least a week before they informed me of my status (in that week I would explore my other options). Did they give me a week? Nope. They gave me 3 hours. After three hours, someone from HR called me and asked me when I was available for the final talk and “most probably sign the contract”. Shit. I was being backed into a corner here. I told them I’d drop by Thursday next week… Oh God.

Come on Globe, come on Smart, HP, PLDT anyone!!! Call me dammit!! Give me something else!!!

I don’t wanna work for 12 hours a day, 5 days a week for 4 years!!! Save Me!!!

After everything that’s happened, you know what? Being a bum’s looking pretty good right about now.

P.S. I have another employment test on Saturday (Fujitsu).

Hmm, what else? Oh yeah… Last Friday I won a cell phone in a raffle (Smart SWEEP sa Megamall), but since I wasn’t there to claim my prize, they gave it to some on else… sad.

Underworld Evolution: Uncut!!!

2006-01-31T21:13:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since the last time i posted anything new (wala kasi ko maisip na i blog eh). But as the fates would have it... now i do!!

A couple of weeks ago, I watched Underworld Evolution (the sequel to the 2000-somthing movie starring Kate Beckinsale as the warewolf slaying vampire Selene). The movie was "so so" (in my opinion masmaganda pa ung 1st movie), but what really caught my attention was the sex scene between Kate Beckinsale and the jack ass-christian bale-wannabee scott speedman.

Cancel that.

What really caught my attention was the ABSENCE of the sex scene between Kate Beckinsale and the jack ass-christian bale-wannabee scott speedman. For those of you who watched the movie, you know what i'm talking about. For those who didn't, its like this...

Michael Corvin (speedman) plays the gentleman by trying to take care of the injured Selene (Beckinsale)... Selene, suffering from a fit of "i'm a woman-save me-you-big boy" complex decides the fool's gonna get some. They start making out, Speedman starts taking of the oh so hot leather that the vampire heroine is wearing... then NOTHING!!! The next few scenes were cut. And the ones who performed the sacriligious act didn't even do a good job! Sobra halata ampota!!!

Suffice to say, i was uber disappointed! For the next couple of weeks, i found out i wasn't alone in feeling this way... Countless heterosexual male acquaintances of mine were as disappointed as i am.

That disappointment ends now!!!

I have come across the deleted scene that those pigs dare take out of the movie!!! Mwahahahaha!!!

Here's what we missed

If you wanna see the whole thing, eto ung link

http://www.iwatchstuff.com/archives/2006/01/
kate_beckinsales_sex_scene_fro.html#
comment

In the end... disappointing parin ung scene (parang ung scene ni Stallone and sharon stone sa the Specialist, stupid artsy shit), but at least na satisfy na ung... curiosity ko. XD And seeing Kate Beckinsale get in on was well worth it... kahit kasama nya ung stupid bastard (scott speedman).

The Year in Review (Gaya gaya ako eh XD)

2006-01-03T17:15:00.000+08:00

I saw a couple of blogs with posts about year 2005; about how it totally sucked ass or about how it totally rocked… So I thought; “Gawa din ako ng the Year in Review para cool din ako!” Hahaha. So here I go.

Since student pa ko, I think of a year as divided into school semesters. So, year 2005 for me is divided into three (Half of the 2nd semester of my 5th year, the whole of my 1st semester of my 6th year and half of the 2nd semester of my 6th year). Since I was for the most part wasted every other day of the week during my second semester of my 5th year, I don’t actually remember that much about it. Haha. Not much to review there :D

The second and third part of my 2005 was mostly spent uh… doing nothing (That’s what happens if your 6th year is made up of a total of 15 units. So as not to bore you with a long winding narrative of what I did and how I felt doing absolutely zilch, I’ll tell you about it… with a song (post).

The curtain raises, then the artificial fog clears revealing me with my handy dandy magic sing…

Rainy Days and Mondays (and any other day of the week for that matter)

Talking to myself and feeling old (really old)
Sometimes I’d like to quit (huhuhu yes I do)
Nothing ever seems to fit
Bummin’ around, nothing to do but frown
Rainy days and Mondays (and any other day of the week for that matter) always get me down

What I’ve got they used to call the blues (Ateneo blue)
Nothing is really wrong (akala nyo lang wala! Pero meron! MERON!!!)
Feeling like I don’t belong (being in 6th year ‘n all)
Bummin’ around some kind of lonely clown
Rainy days and Mondays (and any other day of the week for that matter) always get me down

Funny but it seems I always wind up here with you (Damn u ateneo! Damn yooouu!!!)
Did you know the Ateneo screwed me!?
Funny but it seems that it’s the only thing to do
To run and find the one who screwed me!!!

what I feel has come and gone before (I am not the first sixth year ECE student in AdMU ha!)
No need to talk it out
We know what it’s all about
Bummin’ around, nothing to do but frown
Rainy days and Mondays (and any other day of the week for that matter) always get me down

Thank you! Mabuhay! Mahal ko Kayo!!! Yakkity Schmackity and all that shit…

Ultraelectromagneticjam

2005-12-29T23:32:00.000+08:00

I’ve been hearing songs from this album everywhere! In school (lagi pinapatugtog sa ctc208), at home on the radio or sa mga mp3s namin (haha, shempre galing pirata para cool. Support OPM my ass!!!)… Pucha, me mga blog posts panga kong nakita na in some way connected sa album na to.

To those of you who’ve been living under a rock for the last month or so, Ultraelectromagneticjam is an album of various artist interpreting songs of the Eraserheads, a sort of tribute so to speak, a tribute to some of the greatest song writers of our generation, a tribute to a band that influenced Filipino pop culture of the mid 90s, a tribute to one of the greatest OPM bands of all time (yeah ryt! Malamang wala na pera E-heads so kelangan nila ng money making scheme!! Can you say “royalties”?!).

Anyhoo… regardless of the motives of its release, the album’s out and that’s that. Being the opinionated guy that I am, this post is about what I think of the album (like you haven’t figured that out already). Bottom line is, there were songs that I liked, songs that I didn’t like and songs that I wish were in the album but weren’t.

Stuff that I Liked
LIGAYA by Kitchie Nadal
“Ilang ahit pa ba ang aahitin? O giliw ko?” Nyahahaha! Ano kaya inaahit nya? Kitchie singing this line is hilarious (but in a good way). Astig din ung “’di namn ako manyakis tulad ng iba”. I guess there’s something about a girl singing “macho lyrics”

OVERDRIVE by Barbie Alamabis
If there’s something about a girl singing macho lyrics, there’s much more of that “something” when a PRETTY girl sings macho lyrics. Haha. Saw her perform the song sa MYX Mo concert on TV… Hay Barbie!!! Ang ganda mo! Kahit lesbo ka, ang ganda mo!!!

HWAG MO NANG ITANONG by MYMP
Even though they sometimes irritate the hell out of me (puro cover lng ginagawa nila e), I have to admit astig ung mga songs nila. Lamig kasi ng boses nung girl eh… Dun sa guy na member ng MYMP, wag mo hiwlayan yang chick na yan (kahit di mashado maganda) kasi sha meal ticket mo!!! Pag wala sha tapos ang career mo!!!

HULING EL BIMBO by Rico J. Puno
The Total Entertainer is in the House!!! Bagay na bagay ke Rico J. yung kanta! Weeeeeee!!! Matapos ko patugtugin ung Panakip Butas, sunod na Kaagad tong song na ‘to. (Seryoso ako ha. Gusto ko talaga tong cover na to)

MALING AKALA by Brownman Revival
Actually, di ko namn talaga gusto tong song na to e. But I don’t hate it; I just don’t like it either. Steady lang. Gusto ko lang sha dahil sobra asar si Tay sa Brownman Revival. Hihihi.

Eto naman ang “Songs I Didn’t Like”
PARE KO by Sponge Cola
Regardless of what other people may say about me, I really don’t like Sponge Cola… AT ALL!!! Tapos they go and do a cover of my fave Eheads song!! Shit.

MAGASIN by Paolo Santos
What business does Paolo Santos have singing Magasin!? He should stick to shit like Moonlight over Paris and Through the fire dammit!!! Paolo Santos…. Puh-lease!!!! If he had to be involved with the project, dapat nag “With a Smile” nalng sha. What next, some Diva wannabee like Sarah Geronimo sing a cover of Tuwing Umuulan at Kapiling Ka!? Wait… ginawa na pala un ni Regine Velasquez… buti nalng di kasama sa album.

Eto naman ang “Songs that I Wished were in the Album but Weren’t” segment
TINDAHAN NI ALING NENA by Parokya ni Edgar
Sobra trip ko rin tong song na to. Sobra nakakatawa, bagay na bagay sana sa Parokya ni Edgar.

JULIE TEAR JERKY by Rivermaya
Wala lang. Tingin ko lang bagay. XD

PARE KO by Barbie Almabis
Like I said, maganda ung cover nya ng Overdrive, pero sana eto nalang kinanta nya!!! Pero dapat di palitan yung lyrics! Yung “putang ina” dapat putang ina parin at ung “nabuburat na” dapat nabuburat parin. Saka syempre yung “in love ako, sa isang kolehiyala” wag din palitan!!! Ooohhh yeah!!! Magiging sobra lezzie ng dating pero sobra Hot un! Sobra Cool sana!

Yung mga ibang songs sa album, ok lang. I didn’t find anything wrong with them but nothing about them caught my attention either.

Another Day in the Life of Mike (as told by Dr. Seuss)

2005-12-15T14:57:00.000+08:00

See this boy? His name is Mike
Mike studies in the Ateneo,
He has been studying there for 6 years
One, two, three, four, five, six years.

Yesterday, Mike went to the Ateneo to take an employment test
An employment test is a test to see if you have the chance to stop being a bum
Mike is a bum
Bum, bum, bum, bum.

A company called Canon gave the test
Canon makes printers, cameras, and other boring things
Make took an ojt exam for canon last year, they did not call him back
Mike hates canon
Hate, hate, hate, hate

Even though Mike hates canon, he still took the test
Mike does not want to be a bum when he graduates after six years
One, two, three, four, five, six years.
Bum, bum, bum, bum.

Mike took the employment test with other students who didn’t want to end up as bums
Mike was given a piece of paper and a questionnaire
The test was a multiple choice test
A multiple choice test is a test where you can guess if you don’t know the answer
Mike was happy
Happy, happy, happy, happy

Mike was not happy for long, the test was hard
Hard, hard, hard, hard
The test asked questions about things mike already forgot
Things taught to mike earlier in his six years in college
One, two, three, four, five, six years.
Mike was sad
Sad, sad, sad, sad

Mike had no choice
He had no choice because everyone was covering their papers
Mike could not copy their answers
So mike guessed
Mike answered a lot of questions with the letter “C”
C, C, C, C

After the test, mike felt depressed
He was still going to be a bum
Bum, bum, bum, bum.
Mike wanted to cry,
Cry, cry, cry, cry
But he did not because he was ashamed.
His friends might think he was gay
Being gay is when you like people with pee pees

So in the end, mike was mad at canon
Mad, mad, mad, mad
He convinced himself that he did not want to work in canon in the first place
Mike would rather be a bum
Bum, bum, bum, bum.
Mike thinks canon can shove its employment test up its ass
But shoving the employment test up canon’s ass is impossible
Because Canon is not a real person
And because shoving things up asses is a very rude thing to do

Harry Potter: The Cast that Should have Been

2005-12-02T16:29:00.000+08:00

I watched the latest Harry Potter movie a while back (actually nung 1st day ng showing nya. Excited ako eh XD) and like the rest of my friends, I found the movie quite good. I was actually surprised that I enjoyed the movie. Lets face it, the last three movies were Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Crap, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Crap and Harry Potter and the Crap of Azkaban. I was expecting the 4th one to be Harry Potter and the Goblet of Crap. Good thing I was wrong.

Although I enjoyed the movie, I still have some beef with it, and no it’s not the fact that the main characters can’t act for shit, I accepted that horrid truth years ago. My beef is about some of their casting choices for some of the characters. For me, a good casting job for a movie based on a book is simply this; if the actor in the movie matches how I imagined the character would look like while reading the book, then the casting was great. Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson (tama ba?), terrible thespians they may be, but they match the characters in the book perfectly (ok, so Hermione is way prettier in the moives, I don’t mind, and I bet most of the viewers don’t mind either). The movie versions of snape, mcgonagall, draco and lucius malfoy were also great (plus these guys were WAY better actors).

But some actors in the movie didn’t quite do it for me. So its time for another casting call. Here are the characters I didn’t like in the movies and the actor/actress I think should have played him/her.

Albus Dumbledore
Lets face it. The Dumbledore in the movies is nothing like the Dumbledore in the books. He has none of the humor Dumbledore should have. The Dumbledore in the books often times acts like a senile old fool (of course he gets serious too when necessary, this change in temperament I think is what makes him cool). So I think he should be played by this guy:

The guy who played “Grandpa” in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (di ko alam pangalan nya eh).

Sirius Black
I actually thought casting Gary Oldman was great… until I saw his performance in the movie. He didn’t exude any Sirius Black qualities very well; mystery, insanity, etc. He wasn’t “dark” enough. I think Stewart Townsend will do better (Lestat from queen of the damned and Dorian Gray from LXG). The guy who plays scare crow in batman begins would be a good choice too.

Oh yeah… something should have be done about Sirius’ animagi form… the black mongrel was just a joke.

Mad Eye Moody
Moody in the movie was a damn fat ass! Jeremy Irons would have been better. ‘nuff said.

Cho Chang
Cho Chang in the Goblet of Fire movie was er… not pretty enough for me. Actually she wasn’t pretty at all. Harry Potter having a crush on her was thus hard to swallow. Like the rampant rumors before, they should have given the part to Heart Evangelista. She’s pretty enough, and since she doesn’t have much speaking lines, the fact that Heart can’t act won’t be a problem.

Fleur
Fleur in the movie was cute. But Fleur is supposed to be super mega beautiful. The guys behind the movie should have just randomly opened a Victoria’s Secret catalogue and pointed. Chances are the finger would have landed on some hot 15 year old European girl born to play the part of Fleur.

Ginny Weasly
I have no idea who should play Ginny Weasly, I just know it shouldn’t be the girl who is currently playing her (YUCK!!!). I can’t imagine her playing the Ginny in the 5th and Sixth installments of the Potter series where she gets more exposure and gets romantically linked to harry potter. They should find a replacement and fast dammit!!!

Question about "The Sandman"

2005-11-15T21:34:00.000+08:00

For the past few weeks, I’ve been rereading the Sandman graphic novels. Reading the comic books again made me recall a lingering question that I had about the Sandman mythos.

Before my actual question, I have to bring up the topic of gods in the Sandman universe. In it, the gods exist and draw their power from the people or things that believe and worship them (they come from the dreams of these people), so when the eventuality comes that they are forgotten, they lose their power and eventually die (actually they go back to dreams and die). This description is true for the various gods of the various religions and mythologies; the aesir, the norse gods, the Egyptian deities etc… Poor almighty guys...

My question then has to do with the “Creator” introduced in the Season of Mists story arc. Obviously, this “Creator” (who lives in the Silver City or aka heaven duh!!!) is supposed to be THE God, the Christian and Moslem God, the mighty smiter of sinners, Yaweh, the Alpha and the Omega. In one of the issues (when Cain just came back from hell and was making his report to Dream), Dream said that “save for his Creator, Lucifer is probably the most powerful being in the universe…” So, Lucifer and the Creator guy are stronger even than the Endless themselves right? Here’s my question at last: Is the Creator like the rest of the gods in the Sandman mythos? Is he the most powerful being in the universe because at present he has the most number of believers (catholics, protestants, born again, muslims, ang dating daan, iglesia ni kristo, el shaddai etc...)? Or is he the most powerful being because he’s above these gods, above the Endless and above the Universe itself?

I can’t decide which is true. It is possible that he is like other gods, because in one of the issues of the sandman (kalimutan ko which one) Death says that at the end of the universe, she will take her last brother (Destiny) and “close shop”, which implies that the creator will eventually be forgotten ‘cause in the end, there is only Death . But I think the other argument also has a point. In the comics, the Creator doesn’t act like the other gods or even the Endless who have “human traits” (they are sometimes selfish, more often than not horny bastards and they often make mistakes, probably except Destiny). The Creator is depicted as the God they teach us about in elementary school; all powerful, all knowing, perfect. Finally, unlike the other gods and the Endless, the Creator does not change (change is one of the things that even the Endless undergo according to Destruction. Dream didn’t believe that the Endless change. That is ‘til the “point of view” Morpheus kicked the bucket and Daniel became Dream… then he believed).

Bottom line is I’m stumped… Lam ko na marami ako kilala na nakabasa ng Sandman… what do you guys think?

Undas-ween

2005-11-06T19:46:00.000+08:00

This year’s undas-ween (combi ng undas and holloween… cool ryt?) was not like last year, or the year before. During this time of the year, I am usually in the province with family until the 31st, and then I make it home to spend November 1 or 2 in the cemetery with my mom’s side of the family. This year, I wasn’t in the province. Everybody else went but I stayed home kc wala mag tataong bahay…So, I spent the 31st alone at home. Sad…

So what did I do the whole day? Luckily I bought a new PIRATED PS2 game; Resident Evil 4.

I played the game for the better part of the day. When my eyes started to hurt and I started feeling dizzy, I decided to give the game a rest and watch a DVD (since nothing was worth watching on the tube). I decided to watch Dark Water (the American version starring super hot momma Jeniffer Connely). The movie was okay. I wasn’t THAT scared. Yet…

Before I knew it, it was 2:30 am. I decided to get some shut eye. That’s when it all started. I was lying on my bed thinking about how I spent the day; Playing Resident Evil and watching Dark Water. It occurred to me how fitting it was that I did those things… bagay na bagay sa holloween!!! At first it was amusing then suddenly, it became down right scary. It was All Soul’s day, it was the dead of night, I was all alone and I did nothing but immerse myself in horror media the whole day. When I realized this it got bad REALLY quick. To make matters worse, it started raining really hard. Dark Water seemed a hell of a lot more scary all of a sudden. Shit.

"OhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshit OhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshit OhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshitOhshit..."

I kept mumbling to myself as I hid under my blanket scared shitless. Every creak, every strike of lightning and every howl of a stupid mongrel jostled me. Suffice to say I didn’t sleep very well that night.

Note to self: next undas-ween, if I am ever alone again, lay off the scary stuff!!!

Konyo Speaking Lunatic

2005-10-19T13:34:00.000+08:00

(Note: This post will be written in konyo, thus logic and proper grammar are thrown out the proverbial window)

For the last couple of days, my peeps and I started speaking in konyo. I don’t know why, maybe we thought it was cool kasi eh, that the chikababes really dig guys who make usap like a couple of airheads…

Anyway, JM, Xtiane and yours truly were at school yesterday cuz we like, had our proposal. OMG, it was like so olats! The panelists were like blocking the flow of our water! You know what that means ryt? They were like making bara everything we said! I was like so asar talaga!!! How was I supposed to know that you can’t make basa the RFID tag thingy when it’s made dikit to bakal? Duh!?

After the proposal, I was bad trip to max. Then, I got more badtrip cuz I wanted to eat dinner na but JM and Xtiane wanted to play a game of chess! I was so mad, kasi they like don’t know how to play that game naman. They were just like making usog usog the chess pieces randomly. I thought to myself; “OMG, my friends are like posers…”. Eventually, they got frustrated enough, kasi one of them, can’t remember who, made kalat the chess pieces in the middle of the game. So we were like able to have dinner na. About time!

The three of us had dinner at Chiggy’s with Jamie. I started to get badtrip again cuz the tagaluto was taking so long cooking my super delicious liempo. My Gawd, how long does it take manong to make ihaw the meat ng baboy ba!? Then JM met a friend of his pa, and he thought I was a girl?! He said puro chicks daw ung kasama ni JM. That really leveled up my badtripness. WTF, I’m like totally manly kaya! After the long wait, we eventually got to eat na. When I was busog na, I wasn’t that badtrip anymore. JM wanted to drink beer to celebrate the end of the Sem daw. But I didn’t have money na… there was like twenty pesos in my wallet nalang. Buti nalang he had a preferential option for the poor and made me utang money so I can drink beer din. Yipee!

So we made sakay the tricycle and went to meatshop to chill and have a few beers. Jamie didn’t come with us na cuz it was like late na daw. Party pooper! So we had a round of beer. Then another. Then one more pa daw. After the third round, we were like laughing so loud na. We were like talking about anything under the buwan already. We were like in character pa ha… talking like konyos with the accent ‘n all. I think the peeps in meatshop were looking at us funny na. Why? Haven’t they seen and heard konyo people talk before ba? Posers… But I was surprised ha… JM had more than 2 beers last night. Usually kasi after his second beer he like goes to sleep on the table na. That night he had 4! Xtiane and I had like 5 beers. Then we ordered our sixth, but Xtiane couldn’t finish her sixth beer na. I was like so disappointed with my drinking buddy. So she offered me the rest of her beer nalng, since I’m so macho I said I’d finish both my beer and hers. But I didn’t get to prove my machoness kasi they wanted to go home na. sad…

We took a taxi and dropped JM off were he can make sakay a jeep going to Cubao. I told Xtiane that instead of getting down near my place, I’d make sabay until her house to make sure she got home safe and sound. I’m such a gentleman kasi eh. During the ride home, I thought naklimutan ko ung glasses ko… I was like “OMG Xtiane, I think I left my glasses ah…”. Then I felt my face, I was like wearing it na pala. Haha. Because of that I think Xtiane realized I was drunk narin so she said she could get home by her self na and that she would just text me nalng when she got there. I said yes, I really wanted to be macho and make hatid her pa but I was like sooo sleepy na. As in sleepy talaga. I was able to get home safely naman, and before I made higa on my bed, I made basa Xtiane’s txt that she was in her house narin.

Writing this post shaved off 10 IQ points. I think I’m going to give writing AND talking like a konyo (AKA stupid moron) a rest. When do I start? Like now na noh! XD

Remembering The Saddest Day in Existence

2005-10-04T13:25:00.000+08:00

Going home from school yesterday was a bit of a drag. Aside from the fact that it was raining and I didn’t have a freakin’ umbrella (mine was stolen at Mc Donald’s a few weeks back. Give me back my umbrella a-hole!!!), the trains (LRT and MRT) were uber slow getting from one station to another. So, while I was waiting for the MRT to come along at the Cubao station, I overheard this girl talking to herself (yep, talking to herself XD). From what I could see, she was probably a nursing student (she had the uniform and some books in her hands), she was a bit short, but not half bad in the aesthetics department. Here’s the part that I heard:
“Haaay… eto na ang pinakamalungkot na araw sa buhay ko…”

Apparently, she noticed that I overheard her. She smiled at me and said

“Sorry, ganito lang talaga ako pag wala ako makausap, kinakausap ko sarili ko. Wala pa ko nakakausap since this morning eh…”

I chuckled, then I smiled in return and said “Uhhh.. Okay lang…”

After that brief dialogue, we both minded our own business. I know I should have probably started a conversation, seeing as she told me she hasn’t talked to anyone since this morning, and seeing that she was kinda cute, but I didn’t. Why? Because I’m shy and my mind started to wonder and did I say I was shy?

But honestly, though I was shy, my mind REALLY did wonder. What she said to me reminded me of my own saddest day; a day when I didn’t talk to a single solitary soul.

I was in my second year in college, it was the second semester and I had just shifted into AB Euro (my third course in the Ateneo). I didn’t know anyone in the classes I went to so I generally just kept my mouth shut during class. That particular day was a Wednesday; I left home at around 5:45 AM in order to get to my 7:30 class on time. Everyone at home was still asleep because my brother and sister didn’t have class that day (which also meant I had to fix my own breakfast XD). After a long commute to school, I got to class (PE), I sat at the back and minded my own business. After class, I went to the Library to read a novel (kalimutan ko na kung ano, “Laro sa Baga” ata, hahaha) and wait for my 10:30 class. When 1030 came, I went to my class (Fil 14, ugh… blah blah blah capitalism sux, blah blah blah why not try socialism… blah blah blah hail JoMa Sison) and minded my own business. I ate lunch alone at 11:30, then I went to the library to continue reading my book until 1:30. When 1:30 came along, I went to my class (Eco, sisiw) and minded my own business. My next class (accounting 10 or what I’d like to call accounting for idiots) at 2:30 pm was a free cut because we had a test at 6 pm. I went back to the library, not to study but to continue reading my book; I thought the test was gonna be a piece of cake. When the clock hit 6, I went to Escaler to take the test. The test was a piece of cake but it was depressingly long, I left at around 9:15 pm. I had a late dinner at Jollibee alone. After dinner, I started my long commute home (which was exceptionally longer that day due to traffic). I got home at around 11:30 pm. Everyone was asleep. I took a shower, and then I lay down on my bed feeling sorry for myself and my pathetic little existence.

During that day, I did not have a single conversation with anyone. The only things that came out of my mouth that were directed at other people were:
1. “bayad po”, “para po” (nung nag cocommute)
2. “isang chicken strips at isang tang” (during lunch)
3. “isang meal number 3, go-large ung drink” (during dinner)

After I recalled my experience, I felt I could totally relate to this girl who probably just went through the same experience I did. I suddenly had the urge to start a conversation with her. Maybe having someone to talk to during the train ride home would probably help her a lot. I know it would’ve helped me a lot if some one had talked to me on that stupid day long ago. Plus, she really was kinda cute. But just as I was about to make my move, the train was already at the Shaw station, my stop. Shoot. Oh well… I just smiled at her again (she smiled back) and walked out of the train trying to look as cool as possible in the process.

Dammit! I really should’ve talked to her!! That was my Sassy Girl moment right there and I let it slip away because I remembered something stupid about me!! Curse me and my egotism!!

As a tribute to this experience, here’s a song post; I BELIEVE by Jimmy Bondoc (from the My Sassy Girl Sountrack)

I Believe
Na ikaw lang at ako…
Sana ay, mahal mo rin ako…

Joke lang!! Jimmy Bondoc ampota!!! Hell No!! Not in my blog!! Yuck!! Sh*t!! So Jologs…

Mike the Embarrassing Man

2005-09-24T13:33:00.000+08:00

The Ateneo has its share of celebrities; students who stand out from the rest because of their extra curricular involvements in showbiz, music, sports (specifically basketball) etc. You can walk down the SEC corridors and chances are, you’d suddenly be going “Isn’t she the girl from the _______ commercial?” or “Sha ung front man ng _________ diba?”. You’d probably do a double take, think about asking for an autograph, THEN think better of it and just mosey along to your class or somthin’. That’s how most people’s encounters with celebrities in the Ateneo usually are. Sadly, I’M NOT MOST PEOPLE.

I, being the tactless sunnava a-hole that I am, sometimes take the embarrass-myself-in-front-of-the-celebrity road (Note that this road runs parallel to the piss-off-the-celebrity route, but not always). During my prolonged stay in the Ateneo, I have had three REALLY embarrassing encounters with celebrities, here they are:

FIRST
Celebrities: Antoinette Taus and Dingdong Dantes
When: 1st Year College (M.E. pa ko nito… shit)
Primer:
Francis Amistoso (a.k.a Yuga. kick out ng ateneo 1st year! Ooh yeah!) and I are walking down quad 1 (malapit sa me dog house) when we spot Antoinette and Dingdong walking our way. Just as the pair passes us, this conversation takes place:

Yuga: Mike! Si Antoinette yun pare!!! Pa autograph tayo!!!
Mike: Gago!!! ‘Di mo ba nakikita!? Kasama nya si Dingdong!! Baka gulpihin tayo nun!!! Pintados yun eh!!!
Mike: (Imitating a Pintados action sequence punches Yuga in slow motion) Hu hu hu hu hu hu hu!!!
Mike and Yuga: BWA HAHAHA HAHAHA!!!

Apparently we were speaking a little too loud. ‘Cause when we looked back we saw the pair of them glaring at us. If looks could kill, well... i'd be dead (duh!)

SECOND
Celebrities: Epok Quimpo and Wesley Gonzales
When: 2nd year college. (Com Sci ako nito… wait Euro na ata… damn, can’t remember)
Primer:
One day, I decided to have lunch at manang’s, but when I got there, all the tables were taken. Buti nalang I saw my friend Darn sitting with some people (whom I assumed he didn’t know). So, I sat with him. The day before that, I watched a Mike Cortez led Green Archers basketball squad get a come-from-behind-victory over the UST Tigers. Dazzled by Mike Cortez’ god-like basketball skillz, I couldn’t talk to Darn about anything else but UAAP basketball. I can’t remember the stuff I said, but I know I used Mike Cortez, DLSU and these words in the same sentences:

Astig, Lupit, Lakas, Porma, No.1 Point Guard, Angas, Idol, Champion etc.

Of course, since we were talking about the UAAP, the Blue Eagles obviously came up as a topic of discussion. It was the first round of the 2002 season then, the disheartening loss in the finals of the previous season to our eternal rivals from Taft was still fresh in my mind, and despite the great line-up on paper the Ateneo team wasn’t doing well. Saying I was disappointed was an understatement. Again I couldn’t rememberwhat I said exactly, but I used Ateneo Blue Eagles and these words in the same sentences:

Olats, Bano, Mahina, Banban, chokers, walang laban etc.

It gets worse. After all that talk, this dialogue ensues:

Mike: Sana may trades sa UAAP pare…
Darn: Trade? Bakit naman?
Mike: Para makuha natin si Mike Cortez.
Darn: Eh sino naman ibibigay mo para kay Cortez?
Mike: (with out batting an eye-lash) Si Quimpo!!!

Just then, the person sitting adjacent to us got up to get some more rice or somthin’. Who was it? IT WAS EPOK QUIMPO!!! Wesley Gonzales was sitting beside him laughing his ass off!!! Darn and I ran out of there like bats out of hell! Apparently Darn was aware that we were sitting adjacent to the 2 bball players, apparently he was trying to steer the topic away from basketball the whole time. I had no Freakin’ clue dammit!!!

THIRD
Celebrity: Erwin Something (nakalimutan ko family name, basta ung guitarist ng Sponge Cola)
When: 6th Year College (ECE na ko nito. Sure)
Primer:
I have this habit of suddenly bursting out into song all of a sudden. One day, while enduring another boring lecture in my TH141 class, this habit of mine bit me in the ass.

Mr. Tehido: (Droning on and on about the merits of doing translation work) Blah blah. Blah blah blah blah…blah. Say Yes.
Class: Yeeeesssss…..
Mike: (Out of the blue, with a mini “head bang” comboed with some finger tapping) Kelangan pang pagbigyan! Kulang lang sa Pansi-hin!! Kulang lang sa, kulang lang sa pansin. Kulang lang sa….

Then I freeze… the fact that the guitarist of Sponge Cola is sitting 1 chair away from me hits me like a truck. I turn slowly towards him. He had this weird expression on his face, something like a cross between amusement and disgust. Kala nya cguro fan boy ako ng Sponge Cola (Sponger!). SO NOT TRUE!!! Shit…

In 3s

2005-09-14T22:33:00.000+08:00

While having our meeting with Sir Libatique, Martin YMed me just as Sir Libatique was looking at the monitor... Made one hell of an ice breaker.

Anyways, he "tagged me". Im supposed to provide answers to to some questions "in threes". So, here it goes...

In 3s

I was tagged by: Si Martin nga!

Three names you go by:
1. Mike
2. Michael
3. Domon (only Tay, Charles, Kabo and the rest of the gang calls me this)

Three screen names you have had:
1. michaeldomondon
2. michaelandia_x
3. sandman_x64

Three physical things you like about yourself:
1. Height
2. Hands
3. Hair (my family hates it… that’s why I love it)
Astig!“ Triple H”!! hehe

Three physical things you don't like about yourself:
1. Eyes (labo ng mata ko dammit!!)
2. Teeth (I think I need braces)
3. Feet (they’re too big, la tuloy ako ma arbor na sapatos growing up)

Three parts of your heritage:
1. Igorot
2. Tagalog
3. Demi- God

Three things that scare you:
1. Flying ipis (pag nakakita ako ng lumilipad na ipis I scream like a girly man)
2. Snakes
3. being buried alive

Three of your everyday essentials:
1. Phone
2. glasses (I can’t be seen with out my glasses!)
3. Pencil (para maka doodle ako, anywhere, anytime)

Three of your favorite musical artists:
1. Guns n Roses
2. U2
3. Haji Alejandro (baybeh! Kung talagang mahal mo! Cge pakasal ka…)

Three of your favorite songs:
1. "Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door", Guns n Roses
2. "With or Without You", U2
3. "Panakip Butas", Haji Alejandro

Three things you want in a relationship:
1. Friendship
2. Trust
3. “Quality Time” (oh yeah!)

Three lies and truths in no particular order:
LIES:
1. I’ve never had sex.
2. I never masturbate, kasi mabubulag ako.
3. I don’t watch porn. It’s the work of the devil and I hate it.

TRUTHS:
1. Torpe ako
2. I listen to J-Pop and sing along to the lyrics (kahit ‘di ko naiintindihan)
3. I USED to draw porn (nung high school, sa “all boys” kc cool ka pag magaling magdrawing ng hubad…)

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeals to you:
1. Eyes
2. Shoulders
3. Boobies!!! Hehe (I don't like them huge or anything... I Just like them).

Three of your favorite hobbies:
1. Drawing
2. Watching Movies
3. Writing (gasp! Totoo ba to!? Yep, but I’ve been doing it less and less…)

Three things you want to do really badly now:
1. Graduate Dammit!!!
2. Drive my own car
3. Get my graphic novel published

Three careers you're considering/you've considered:
1. Electronics and Communications Engineer malamang!!
2. Taga ayos ng cellphone sa greenhills (backlight bossing?)
3. Comic book artist

Three places you want to go on vacation:
1. Boracay (di pa ko nakakapunta eh)
2. Amsterdam (modern day Sodom baby!!)
3. Bahammas

Three kid's names you like:
1. Michael Dennis Jr.
2. Caitlin (I think its cute)
3. Raistlin (para sa kapatid na lalake ni Caitlin hehe)

Three things you want to do before you die:
1. GRADUATE!!!
2. Create the Republic of Michaelandia
3. Become rich enough to afford cryo freezing so I can live forever!!!

Three ways that you are stereotypically a boy:
1. I scratch my balls, my ass and every other orifice in public
2. I’m boisterous
3. I pretend not to watch chick flicks

Three ways that you are stereotypically a girl:
1. It takes me twenty to thirty minutes to take a shower
2. I cry when I watch a sad movie or read a sad book.
3. I use expressions like “di ko type/feel” or “eeww/kadiri”.

Three celeb crushes:
1. Jessica Alba
2. The Chick from “my sassy girl” movie.
3. Karel Marquez (the Karel Marquez video scandal is burned in my mind!)

THREE people that I would like to see take this quiz:
1. Xtiane (another excuse to whine dude)
2. Tay (he gives funny insights… worthless, but funny)
3. Charles (Hula ko, sobra nakakatawa sagot ng taong to!)

What Goes Around Comes Around

2005-09-08T15:44:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was great!! I got my Theo mid terms back!!! I got an A!!! Woohoo!!! 30/30!! Perfect score (nung umpisa, 29/30 sha, pero may correction ako)!!

I’d have to honestly say that I wasn’t surprised to get an A (prinedict ko pa na makaka A ako, check my previous post “A Hellday and a Throwback to 2004"), hustler talaga ko sa theo eh! Mwa hahahaha!!! Pero, in all honesty, swerte din, kasi nakuha ko ung set na pinaka alam ko...

To think na pumasok sa utak ko na mandaya sa midterms na un (isusulat ko dapat ung kodigo ko sa Bible!!), buti nalng di ko ginawa (na konsensya ako, sa Bible ko pa isusulat ung kodigo!!), hindi pala kelangan at may nahuli na gumawa nun! F kaagad sa course!! Phew!!

Furthermore, something bad happened to my Theo group leader. Like I said in the previous post I mentioned above, I heard him mention he didn’t do so well in the midterm. Apparently, he gave himself way too much credit when he said that. He got a 0/30!! That’s what I call academic ruin man!! 30 percent ng theo ung midterm namin!!!

Medyo na guguilty tuloy ako, kasi after nya bangitin na medyo sablay ung midterm nya, sabi ko sa sarili ko “buti nga sayo!! (to those wondering ba’t galit ako sa kanya, check “Mike’s post of Rage”) ‘Di ko naman akalain na zero makukuha nya!!! As I said, nagui-guilty ako… pero onti lang!! So, in the words of my hero Spongebob Squarepants:

Sweet, Sweet, SWEET VICTORY!! Yeah!!
It is mine for the taking!!
It’s mine for the fight!!

In the Sweet, Sweet, Sweet Victory…

Pero sana, wag naman siya bumagsak ng Theo… I’m not that bad, to wish something like that on someone else. Besides, sabi naman ng teacher namin na pwede “gawan ng paraan” ung mga bumagsak sa midterms. Sana magawan nya ng paraan. Sana lang mahirapan siya ng onti dammit!!

Song 2!!

2005-09-04T14:26:00.000+08:00

Ah… here I am again, another Sunday with nuthin’ to do? I missed the Kim Possible Movie again last night because I was out. Stupid Disney channel, no replay today dammit! So instead of watching the tube, I’m passing the time, as Jamie loves to say, doing my thesis (Nagblo-blog). Since it’s been a while since my first song post, I think its due time for my second one.

The song I posted is the National anthem of the Republic of Michaelandia!! Where and what is Michaelandia you say? Why, its my own personal country mwahahahaha (at least its going to be when I graduate and make myself filthy stinkin’ rich enough to buy my own country) !!

The Michaelandia National Anthem is sung to the tune of Phantom Planet’s California a.k.a the “O.C.” theme song. Stand tall and sing proud citizens!!

Michaelandia

Mike is really cool
Mike is really great
Mike is really number 1
Michaelandia here we come
Right back where we started from

Mike’s muscles weigh a ton
Michael is for fun
Michael is for everyone
Michaelandia here we come
Right back where we started from

Michaelandia!
Here we come!

On the stereo
Listen as you go
Nothing’s gonna stop Mike now
Michaelandia here we come
Right back where we started from

When Mike hits the floor
Everybody roars
Everybody enjoys the show
Michaelandia here we come
Rightback where we started from

Michaelandia!
Here we come!

Booyah!! This song’s gonna be an instant classic baby!!

A Hell day and a Throwback to 2004

2005-09-01T10:08:00.000+08:00

To those of you who don’t know, I only have two subjects this semester; DSP and TH141. That being the case, I usually snicker to myself whenever I hear other students in the Ateneo bitch and whine about “Hell week” or “Hell day”. Yesterday was not one of those days.

Yesterday I experienced my very first Hell day this semester.

I woke up at around 8:00 am (after sleeping for only about 4 hrs.) so I could be at school by 10:00 am. I met Hubert and we STARTED our power point presentation for our DSP report. Yes, wala pa kami nasisimulan before that time and I did not know where to begin. The report is around 40% of our final mark (Not sure, pero basta malaki) and wala pa kami nagagawa. Our report was scheduled for 3:30 pm and I had a midterm exam in theo at 2:30 pm!! Speaking of the theo midterm, it is 30% (eto sure ako) of my grade and its scope was…. “extensive” (para sakin lng siguro kasi last time ako nag core subject 1st sem last year, nanibago ako sa dami ng readings). I’d like to note that out of the extensive coverage of this midterm, I only read 1 article. Hinapit ko ung pagbasa nung mga review notes ng classmates ko!! I spent the better day of August 29 (birthday ko) studying dammit (what a way to spend my birthday)!!

I was so tightly wound that saying I was tense should be nominated for the understatement of the year.

Lucky for me, this wasn’t one of those hell days were I crash and burn and academic Armageddon reigns down on my sorry ass. The day turned out fine. I took the midterm and I felt confident about my answers to the questions (feeling ko, pwede ako maka A, sana). Narinig ko pa ung group leader ko nagsalita na meron daw siyang di nasagutan… Buti nga!!! Mwa ha hahahaha!!! The DSP report turned out okay too. Jaewoo (ung isa ko pang ka group sa DSP) made a power point on his own and saved us. Lucky!!

That being said, I met up with Xtiane and JM at CTC 208 for the day’s meeting. Jamie and Lana were there too doing their thesis (WOW!!). After the meeting, we decided to have a few beers sa Miko’s (after a hell day that turned out great, sarap uminom ng booze). Humabol si Lassie and we had a couple of drinks. When I say “we”, I mean ako at si Xtiane. Eto ung tally kung ilan bote ininom:

Lana: 1 ½
Jamie: 1 ½
JM: 2 (parang dati, isa palang pulang-pula na)
Lassie: 0 (di parin umiinom ng beer)
Mike: ?
Xtiane: ?

Nakalimutan ko na kung ilan nainom namin (hehe). Anyways, hapi hapi kami. Parang nung good old days last year (nung 5th year super seniors pa kami at hindi 6th year super duper seniors huhuhu) nung inuman every TTH ng gabi after Pineda tapos papasok kay Celso ng may hang over hahaha!!

Who I am according to Tarot

2005-08-27T10:13:00.000+08:00

Saw this entry on Xtiane's blog about Tarot card readings... Since I'm in school on lovely a Saturday morning and my damn groupmates are already 1 hour late for our meeting I am totally bored. With nothing else to do, I took the blasted test. According to the Tarot gods, I am:

I am The Hanged Man

The Hanged Man reminds us that the best approach to a problem is not always the most obvious. When we most want to force our will on someone, that is when we should release. When we most want to have our own way, that is when we should sacrifice. When we most want to act, that is when we should wait. The irony is that by making these contradictory moves, we find what we are looking for.

What do I say? I think having a Tarot card by the name of "The Hanged Man" is pretty damn cool!! The only problem is the definition pretty much sux!! In no way am I what this Tarot card portrays me to be. So... im again gonna take control of my destiny dammit!! This is my Hanged Man Tarot card:

Mike the Hanged Man

Like the Gods of Norse Mythology, I am great! I am marvelous and spectacular! Yet at the same time, destiny is heavy upon my shoulders... Ragnarok nears and it is inevitable. Godly I may be, but there is nothing that can prevent its coming. There will come a time when I will finally graduate from college and I will have to start working. The days of being a lazy bummeth will thus, come to a conclusion. Yes... Ragnarok is coming. I am screwed.

Now there's a card that defines me!! Ooohh Yeah!!

My Top 10 Cover Songs of All Time

2005-08-24T11:50:00.000+08:00

I’ve been hearing a lot of cover songs on the radio as of late (nakikita ko rin ung mga videos nila, kadalasan olats). A lot of Filipino acts do cover songs (MYMP, Paolo Santos etc.), some even come up with whole albums of them (Nina and Regine Velascuez).

Some people hate cover songs, but I don’t. Don’t get me wrong though, siyempre naasar din ako pag me nambababoy ng mga astig na kanta (e.g. Britney Spears and her rendition of I love Rock ‘n Roll comes to mind). But there are instances when artists take songs and make them their own, sometimes even making them, in my opinion better. Sometimes an artist can take a song and introduce it to a whole new generation.

So I came up with this list of my favorite cover songs of all time. They are ranked from 10 to 1 (one being the best, duh!). Some people may disagree with my list, that’s perfectly fine, it’s my list dammit!

10. I DON’T WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND by Nina
-This song was big a few months back. Nina did her Mariah Carrey thing and took this new wave song by Cindy Lauper and added some diva-ish flavor.

9. BABY CAN I HOLD YOU TONIGHT by Boyzone
- I’m not really a fan of boybands, but I think Ronan “Mr. I’m-singing-through-my-nose” Keating and co. (bading ung isa sa kanila dib a?) did a great job rendering this Tracy Chapman original (Sobra stupid lang nga ng video).

8. WAITING IN VAIN by MYMP
- Doobie music! Accoustic style! Bob Marley should be saluting MYMP with his weed pipe for the great job they did on his song (ganda ng boses ng girl ng MYMP, simple lang pero swabe).

7. WITH OR WITHOUT YOU by Utada Hikaru
-I saw this J-Pop princess’ version of my favorite U2 song in a MTV Unplugged show. I like her voice and she’s pretty cute too. Her song Automatic made it to the Philippines around 2000. For those of you who are wondering, Utada Hikaru is not the chick who hangs out with Dice & K9.

6. SMOOTH CRIMINAL by Alien Ant Farm
- I don’t know if they were paying homage or mocking the King of Pop with this cover song, but Alien Ant Farm’s smooth criminal rocks (eto nga lng cool nilang kanta eh)! They took one of Wacko Jacko’s greatest songs (we sometimes forget that this wierdo made a lot of great tunes), and added some punk flavor. Plus, the video is hilarious!

4. TAINTED LOVE by Marilyn Manson
- When I heard Marilyn Manson’s version of this Cure classic, a got a whole new meaning to the term “Tainted Love”. He (or she) makes it sound so… evil (but in a good way). Manson’s version of this song reminds me of the Vampire Lestat (The rock star vampire in Anne Rice’s “The Vampire Chronicles”).

3. TORN by Natalie Imbruglia
- Yep, this song is a cover. It was first sang by Edna Swap (cno un!?) from an album called Wacko Magneto (Ano un!?). That’s the reason this song is on my list! Apparently Natalie Imbruglia took a song that nobody cared about and made it such a monster hit!! Edna Swap probably wants to rip her head off and piss on her skull…

2. THE MAN WHO SOLD THE WORLD by Nirvana
- Kurt Cobain and company did an unplugged version of this David Bowie original a few months before he blew his freakin’ brains out. He probably thought of the song as sort of a pre-death eulogy or something. It’s my favorite Nirvana song, and God knows how I loved Nirvana growing up! PUNKS NOT DEAD Woohoo!!

1. KNOCKIN’ ON HEAVEN’S DOOR by Guns and Roses
- Guns and Roses were the last of a dead breed of Rockstars. They were the last of a breed of musicians who depicted themselves as “larger than life”. They were the last of the Rockstars who drew themselves up to be gods among men. Yes, Axel Rose and Slash were the gods of my youth, and Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door was my anthem. I loved this song even before I knew Bob Dylan was behind it. In my mind, Guns and Roses took a great song by a great musician and made it their own. In my opinion, that is truly something great.

"Tooning" Natalie Portman

2005-08-19T23:19:00.000+08:00

I’m supposed to be having my immersion starting today, but if you read my previous post, you know it’s not happening right? Right…

Since I had nothing else better to do today (wasn’t in the mood for much anyways, and the TV shows pretty much sucked), I decided to play around with Adobe photoshop. I’ve been seeing a lot of “cartoonized” pictures on magazine ads and on the internet recently so I’ve been experimenting making a few. My last attempt was totally hideous to say the least. I made Sophia Bush (the cute girl who plays Brooke in One Tree Hill) look like Michael Jackson for crying out loud. This time, I decided to make one using a photo of myself (my grad pic to be precise, don’t ask me why I have one when I haven’t even graduated yet), but I apparently deleted the copy from the PC. So, I decided to use a celebrity photo instead. I saw a cute pic of Natalie Portman in Kabo’s blog and decided to use it instead. Here’s the photo:

Now here’s the photo after I “cartoonized” it:

I think it’s pretty decent, though a lot more improvements can be made, especially the eyes and hair. What do you guys think?

Mike’s Post of Rage

2005-08-18T11:46:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, something very bad happened to me. I wasn’t able to go to the immersion orientation last Monday because my group leader didn’t tell me there was an orientation. So yesterday I went to OSCI to attend another one. There wasn’t another one. The girl behind the OSCI desk was very uncooperative. Bottom line is I’m going to miss the immersion this Friday and there is only a slim chance I get to go to another immersion site at another date. The immersion is a requirement of my TH141 class. These two people (my group leader and the girl behind the OSCI desk) made me mad. So, I am now going to take a page of Charles’ book by letting out my frustrations in this post.

Disclaimer:
If you are offended by foul language, please stop reading. Please bear with me, I am merely releasing pent up frustration.

*Mike takes a deep breath*

Putang ina kang hayop na group leader ka!! Ano ba naman ung sabihin mo sa akin na may orientation nung Monday ng 4:30!! Mahirap bay un!? Tapos tatanungtanungin kita kung bakit di mo sinabi, sasabihin mo “kasi hindi ako nagtanong”. Fuck You Asshole!! Nung sinali ako sa group mo BY FORCE kasi 2 lang kayo, I should have gotten the message that you’re a motherfucking loser!! Papagawa ka pa ng review notes na deadline ng August 2, tapos mag na nag ka sobra, tapos isusubmit mo ng August 15 kasi hindi mo pa tapos yung part mo!! Tang ina mo! Palusot ka pa na marami ka kasing ginagawa!! Hayop!! Ilan beses mo ako rinemind about the fucking review notes?! 6 na beses gago!! Ilan beses mo ko rinemind about ung orientation!? Zero you prick!! Hindi ka pa patay sinusunog na kaluluwa mo sa impyerno gago!!

As for you, you stupid stuck up bitch, porke alam mo na requirement ng mga students ung immersion sobrang high and mighty mo!! Ina mo!! I tried being polite dammit, it isn’t my fault that my group leader is GALACTICALLY STUPID!! Pero you didn’t even lift a fucking finger!! Screw you!! Tinanong kita kung ano mga options ko, sabi mo “magdasal”! MAGDASAL!? That’s the best you can fucking come up with!? ARRRGGGGHHHH!!! Siyet!! Tapos magsusubmit lang ako ng medical, dami dami mo pang sinabi hayop ka! Well, since hindi naman ako makakasama sa immersion, you can take my medical, dust it off, fold it up real nice, turn the sunnavabitch side ways and stick it up your tight ass bee-atch!! IF YA SMELL WHAT THE MIKE IS COOKING!!!

Pasalamat kayong dalawa na olats ung cellphone ko at wala camera, kung hindi, nakapost din sana mga mugshots nyo dito dammit!!

Phew. Now that its off my chest, I feel a lot better. :D

The Girl Next Door

2005-08-16T16:14:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, I visited my mom ‘cause she had a mild stroke (nasobrahan daw sa stress, ‘di ko naman cguro kasalanan XD). What kind of ungrateful son would I be not to visit my sick mom right? So I cancelled my other plans and dropped in on my mom. When I got there, she was feeling a lot better thankfully, but she still needed to rest. That being the case, she was mostly asleep the whole time I was there. So, I had to find a way to entertain myself for a couple of hours. Solution? Watch a pirated DVD (my mom built up quite a selection since the last time I visited).

The movie I chose was “The Girl Next Door”. Its pretty old, it came out in 2004. I know ‘cause I saw ads for it in the internet (Yahoo movies etc.) around that time. The movie poster got me curious (a picture of some hot chick with an extreme “come hither” look does that to me). The funny thing was, it never came out in the Philippines. After watching the movie, I can understand why.

The story is about a high school senior who lives a boring life (you know, no girlfriend, no social life, the works), until he meets, Danielle (played by Elisha Culthbert) the super hot babe who just moved in next door and for some reason totally digs him. They fall in love, fast (happens in the first 30 min. of the movie, unlike the typical loser-gets-hot-momma-movie where they fall for each other 10 minutes before the ending credits). Then, he finds out that Danielle is actually a PORNSTAR (his friend shows him one of her movies). Our hero then goes through the paces of saving this girl from her profession in some extraordinary circumstances (one involving WWE wrestler Matt Morgan) until they live happily ever after. The end.

Suffice to say, the movie was filled with loads of sexual content (more than any American Pie themed movie I’ve seen anyway). As it goes with these kinds of movies, the story wasn’t so great. But obviously the story isn’t this movie’s selling point. Basically it’s a movie for guys (even though it’s a love story). It paints a picture perfect world where the average joe can get the girl of his dreams, make a name for himself, and become filthy stinking rich in a span of a single school year. Bottom line, its every high school senior’s dream (every guy’s dream for that matter). This movie is a love story that guys can watch without making them feel queasy.
All in all, it was a fun movie. It gave some pretty good laughs and it helped me pass the time

I just think there’s one flaw. No porn star is as hot as Elisha Culthbert man! If you’ve ever watched American porn, you’ll know where I’m coming from.

One thing though, why does my mom have a DVD of this movie? Hmmm…

Casting Call #1: The Sandman

2005-08-12T13:49:00.000+08:00

I remember, in grade school and high school, reading a magazine (Wizard ata) that sometimes featured a bit where they would cast a movie they would want to see made (the movie was usually based on one comic book or another). Since I always thought it was a cool exercise, thinking of actors to play certain parts, and since now, I have somewhere to publish my opinions, I decided to make my own bit.

As you can see in the title of this post, my current “wish movie” is the Sandman. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the Sandman (meron pa ba?), it’s a graphic novel by writer Neil Gaiman (Stardust, Neverwhere, American Gods) which focuses on Dream/Morpheus and his quest to find meaning to his existence (this is what I think anyways). He is a member of the Endless, seven siblings who have existed since the beginning of time, each of them embodies one thing that makes humans human. So below is a “casting call” for the Endless. I would’ve liked to “cast” more of the characters (daming cool characters sa series na ‘to e.g. The Corinthian, Cain, Abel etc…), but doing so would take too much of my time (and my time is very valuable… ha!).

Movie: The Sandman

Director: Tim Burton
-Tim Burton is the obvious choice, his style and aesthetic fits perfectly with The Sandman’s often times, dark and surreal world. I think Christopher Nolan (Batman Begins) would do a good job too.

Dream/Morpheus: Johnny Depp
-I think he’s the only one who can play Dream. Johnny Depp can play stoic characters like Edward Scissorhands, he can be introspective like his character in Sleepy Hollow he can be savvy-cool like Jack Sparrow or weird like Willy Wonka. He has enough range to play the often times unpredictable Dream. Plus, if Tim Burton is aboard, you gotta have Johnny Depp right!? They go together like bread and butter, like lamb and tuna fish!

Destiny: Christopher Lee
-He played the White Wizard Saruman, Count Dracula, Count Dookoo and most recently Willi Wonka’s dentist dad. How hard could it be to play a guy in friar’s robes who mostly just stands around looking cool? In fact, almost anyone can play Destiny. I just chose Christopher Lee ‘cause he’s in 2 Tim Burton movies this year (Chocolate Factory and Corpse Bride). If he doesn’t want the role, you could always get the guy who plays Darth Sidious/ Emperor Palpatine in the Star Wars Movies…

Death: Keira Knightley
-Death is almost everyone’s favorite character in the series, kaya tingin ko marami ang ‘di mag-a agree sa choice ko. Why Keira Knightley? Why not? Dye her hair black and make it curly. Make her skin pale. Give her the outfit; Black Sleeveless top, leather pants and boots, the ankh necklace and that cute cooky top hat. Finally, give her the henna-like-design tattoo under her left eye and you got the perfect Death! Plus Keira Knightley is totally hot (I love her cute English accent too)!

Destruction: Triple H
-Who better to play a muscle bound, long haired, bearded man than a wrestler? Triple H looks the part! Since he’s a wrestler, he can most probably act decent enough too (Triple H was in the movie Blade Trinity, didn’t watch the movie though ‘cause a lot of people said it sucked big time).

Desire: The chick that played Angel Gabriel in Constantine
-Dammit! I forgot her name! But the girl (she also plays the White Witch in the Chronicles of Narnia) who played the androgynous Angel Gabriel in Constantine seems perfect. I’ve never been a fan of how Desire looks in the comic book. She/He has never looked… umm “Desirous”. If you have a name like Desire, you should be totally hot right? Oh well Rockwell.

Despair: CG character voiced by Helena Bonham Carter
-Despair is a little gray, obese woman with lots of scars (plus she practically has nothing on). I think using a real live actor to play her would be super gross! Go the Gollum/Smeagol route to get a faithful adaptation of Despair. Why is she voiced by Helena Bonham Carter? Uhh… because Tim Burton is directing the movie and he probably can’t resist casting his real life wifey.

Delirium: Dakota Fanning
-I know she’s probably too young to play this role, but Hollywood movie magic can rectify this problem. Aside from her age, I think she has what it takes as an actress to play the crazy-insane Delirium.

Mike the Immature Man

2005-08-09T11:21:00.000+08:00

A few weeks back, I met up with a couple of my friends from high school for dinner. While we were being boisterous, rude and irritating to the rest of the diners, one of my friends brought up a hypothetical question to be answered by the rest of the group. So here’s the question;

If you and the girl of your dreams were a couple, what do you imagine yourselves doing together?

Each of us gave our answers. One said, talking together, another said watching T.V. together, another said eating together… After hearing their answers I thought “What the hell is wrong with you people!?” Hypothetically speaking, the girl of your dreams is madly in love with you and the things you imagine yourselves doing are eating (probably at jollibee), surfing the tube (watching Darna) and having a conversation (about the philosophy of ethics I bet)?! After telling them off for being such lame losers, I gave MY answer.

I would imagine us making out.

It’s as simple as that. In my mind, Jessica Alba and I (or that cute girl who lives a couple of blocks down) would be making out. We would be kissing, smooching, snogging. frenching, getting to 2nd Base (or is it 3rd base?) in a setting of my choosing. Get the picture?

I couldn’t believe a heterosexual male in his right mind would think of something otherwise. Eating, watching T.V., and talking? Give me a break! So I tell them, “maybe you’re just telling the first part of your fantasy”. Maybe you and the girl of your dreams are eating, watching T.V. or talking THEN you start making out.

I could just imagine myself and Natalie Portman having dinner. We are eating. We both reach for the salt. Our fingers touch. We look at each other, both take deep breaths… and it happens. Utensils are flying through the air, plates and glasses crash to the ground breaking into pieces. Then the cheesy saxophone music starts to play.

Apparently not. They denied my accusation vehemently. According to them, it’s just eating, watching T.V. or talking. Period.

After, a few more minutes of heated argument, the guy who posed the question announced that the hypothetical question was a test, a test of emotional maturity. According to him, imagining situations WITHOUT sexual content was a sign of maturity.

I failed. According to the test, I AM AN EMOTIONALLY IMMATURE PERSON. The rest of my friends (the mature ones) then gave me the ha-were mature and your not-triumphant look. Shit.

I still don’t buy it dammit! What’s the validity of that freakin’ test anyway!? Is it an approved test given by psychiatrists (“Oh, you imagined something sexual in nature, sorry sir, you’re immature. Have a nice day”)?!

I bet it’s even the same for women. Question for the girls; if you and Josh Hartnett (or Orlando Bloom or Brad Pitt or whoever) were a couple, wouldn’t you be imagining the two of you making out on some deserted beach as the sun is going down?! Or at least some light kissing and snuggling in the back seat of a car!? Come on! You can’t be imagining you and Chad Michael Murray watching Sponge Bob Squarepants, eating at Burger Machine or talking about philosophy or politics!!

What do you guys think? Is it immature to imagine you and the girl/boy of your dreams making out instead of eating, watching T.V. or talking?

I, for one, think not!!!

If I Were...

2005-08-04T19:07:00.000+08:00

In school last night, I saw a couple of my classmates answering some of those internet quizzes/tests. You know, the one’s were you answer a couple of questions, and in the end, you find out how much of a bitch you are, how gay you are or even which of the seven dwarves you are. You can then post the results in your blog for everyone to see!

The tests are fun and all, but I like to be in control of my on destiny thank you very much. I don’t want a couple of questions determining whether I’m a green or a blue or whether I’m Han Solo or Jar Jar Binks. So I say screw the test! With a little introspection, a little honesty and some stretching of the truth, I get to say who or what I am!

This is what I’m doing in this post. Below I have three results, sans taking the tests. I hope to continue this in future posts. Here we go!

1. If I were a character in the television show the O.C. I would be…

Seth Cohen

I’m egotistical and self centered (check). I love talking about myself and what I think (check). I talk too much (check again). I sometimes think I’m better than everyone else (check). I love to read and draw comics (check). I find myself irritated and intimidated by “jocks” (check dammit). I obsess over things and people (check). My ex girlfriends include the hottest girl in school and a bartender-slash-lesbian hottie with a tattoo (uhh… check?). I wish.

2. If I were a Television talk show host I would be…

Conan O’ Brien

Yep. I would be him. He’s got a sense of humor that most people don’t appreciate. His mannerisms make him hilarious, quirky and most of the time weird. At home, I’m the only one who thinks he’s funny. They (family) think he’s corny, uncouth and tactless and they hate his guts. They feel the same way about me hahaha!! Besides, who are the other choices in this category? Jay Leno (I don’t think he’s funny at all, and what's with his chin?)? David Letterman (he’s okay, kind of a DOM sometimes though)? David Schapel (sometimes funny)? Kuya Germs (oh hell no)?! Cut me some slack.

3. If I were a character in the Lord of the Rings I would be…

Legolas Greenleaf

Nope. It’s not what you’re thinking, Its not because he’s dashing, cool and is played by a blonde haired Orlando Bloom. Nope. That’s the movie version of Legolas. I’m the book version.

Yep. I’d have to be this guy. I’m the guy in the group who bursts out in song every chance I get. I wonder why Aragorn, Gimli and the rest of the fellowship didn’t pummel him to death (“Taste Anduril you blasted elf!”). My friends don’t pummel me; they just put their hands to their heads and hide in shame…

Hanging around! Nothing to do but frown!
Rainy days and Mondays always get me DOOOOOWWWWN!!!

I love you Araneta!! Woohoo!!!

3 Chinese guys, A Filipino Dude, and a Girly Movie

2005-08-01T17:00:00.000+08:00

This is sort of a sequel to my previous post. After a few hours of sleep (after the rights to royalty concert), I took a shower and headed to G4 at around 3 in the afternoon to meet Kabo, Tay and Tops (‘di nakasama c charles, team building ampota) to watch a movie and have dinner. We were supposed to watch Stealth, but I already watched it last Wednesday. So, we watched Wedding Crashers instead. I don’t know why we did it, after making the same mistake before (hitch). But there we were, 4 straight guys (3 chinese, 1 filipino), watching another girly movie.

Before we go further, I have to give my definition of a girly movie. According to the dictionary of mike the invincible man:

Girly Movie (aka chick flick): A movie about a love story between a guy and a girl. guy meets girl, guy and girl fall in love, guy screws up, guy loses girl, guy apologizes and confesses his undying love to girl (sometimes in private, but most of the time in front of a big crowd), guy gets girl and they live happily ever after.

Here are some additional characteristics of a girly movie that may or may show itself.
-guy has a quirky best pal
-girl has a quirky best pal
-weird parents
-bitchy girlfriend (for the guy)
-tough, obnoxious, sexist boyfriend (for the girl)

wedding crashers: On the invincible man’s scale of girlyness, this movie gets a 5.5 over 10.

Scale:
1 being a movie like Honey (Jessica alba), 5 being a movie like Jerry Maguire (Tom Cruise) and 10 being Crossroads (Britney Spears).

Anyway, the movie was okay. It was pretty funny actually (especially Vince Vaughn, love his rape/bondage scene). Owen Wilson was… well, Owen Wilson (he plays all the parts he plays the same way. In fact, I don’t think acts as all, he’s just himself in all his movies). Will Ferell makes a cameo. What is it with Vince Vaughn, Owen and Luke Wilson, Will Ferrel and Ben Stiller!? They keep popping up in each other’s movies… Though the story was predictable (very), all in all, I think the movie was good.

But, Wedding Crashers IS a girly movie, thus I couldn’t help notice the people watching it. In our isle, the sitting arrangement went something like this; guy, girl, guy, girl, guy, girl, GUY, GUY, GUY, GUY (that would be us), guy, girl… shit.

Bottom line is, I enjoy watching movies like Wedding Crashers, girly movies they may be, but they can be really fun. Its just that watching it with guys is so… unmanly. If there were a girl in a group (kahit na isa lng, romantic attachments unnecessary), it would be different, guys could then watch the movie, masculinity unquestioned.

Note to Self:
Next time, watch the girly movie like wedding crashers with a group that has a member of the opposite sex in it. That way, watching it will not make me feel uh… weird. Then, watch the macho man movie like Stealth with the guys, so we can be sexist jerks and stare at Jessica Biel in a teeny weeny blue bikini.

2 Guys, a Girl and a Pansitan Place

2005-07-30T23:49:00.000+08:00

Nope, this isn’t a parody of the American sitcom, “2 Guys a Girl and a Pizza place”. This is a post about an attempt to watch the MTV Right to Royalty concert. Last Friday night my peeps and I (peepulation=2, JM and Xtiane) went to Taguig to watch the concert. As expected, like the fette we went to last time, the place was infested by, what JM affectionately calls, orcs (ba’t di nalng fighting uruk’ kai para mas astig?). Aside from that, we were so far away I could barely see a thing (at least sa fette kita parin ung mga tao sa stage). Some of the performers were okay. Rivermaya was there (pero ung last song nalng naabutan namin), so was Barbie, the Dawn (singing “Salamat”… ah the nostalgia), South Border (not really into them, think they cater to chicks), 7 Shots of Wisdom (cute nung isang chick nila)… Some of the performers… uhh not so okay. There was this ethnic music chick (I forget her name), AND SARAH GERONIMO and LASTIKMAN (Mark Bautista)!!! WTF were they doing there!? Besides, wasn’t the concert pro Intellectual property rights of artists for their songs? What business does Sarah “feeling diva” Geronimo have singing a cover/revival of “I wanna know what love is?” Syet! By the time Kuh Ledesma took the stage, we decided to call it quits (we could only take so much!). I kind of regretted it, ‘cause after Kuh Ledesma, Mr. Pure Energy himself (‘di ung ECE faculty ha) took the stage. I could here Gary V. belt out his classic hits like "Eto nanaman" and "‘di bale nalang" as we left the concert grounds (Old School! Kulang nalng c Martin Niverra, parang 80’s Kolehiyala killer days na!)…

After standing for 2 hours or so we were understandably hungry. We went around the place looking for a spot to eat. We couldn’t find one. We went around the strip place thingy (don’t know this place eh, sa food court lang ako ng star mall nag chi-chill! Hahaha!!), dami tao!! After going through the paces of thinking of a place to eat, pier 1 (dami tao dammit!), etu mama tambien (can’t believe they named a resto after a perverted movie), pizza hut, jollibee (katipunan food? Hell no!?), we decided to eat… well at Ado’s.

To those who don’t know, Ado’s is this pansitan in the heart of Pasig (malapit sa may San Joachin). Haha, punta punta pa kami sa Fort, sa Ado’s lang pala ang bagsak namin (how classy)!
Pero in fairness, apparently institution na ung Ado’s (50 years na daw, sabi ni Xtiane). So, there we were, twenty somethings eating pansit along with middle aged men and women at an ungodly hour in the morning while the rest of our age group were probably in restobars along Libis, the Fort, Malate or Tomas Morato (*sigh*), bouncin' to the beats of R. Kelly or somthin' (freakin' pedophile). But you know what? I had fun eating pansit with friends at 1 in the morning. Its not the place, its the company right (cheesy shit ampota)? Plus, sarap parin ng Lomi nila (may pandesal pa)! Solve ako!! :D

Boys Don't Cry... that Often

2005-07-28T19:45:00.000+08:00

No, it’s not what you’re thinking. This is not another song post (to those who don’t know, the title of this post boys don’t cry is a song by the Cure, hence the possible wrong assumption that this post is a song post). What it is is another list. What can I say? It’s a Thursday (no classes for this sixth year ECE student) and I’m bored.

“Boys don’t Cry” is not just a song, it’s also a saying (the kind of thing your dad says to you when your at the grocery rolling around the floor wailing because he won’t get you Nestle Koko Crunch or something). It is a stereotype society imposes on me and my kind (were not supposed to be like girls who stereotypically cry their eyes at every opportunity they get). But the bottom line is, it just ain’t true! Boys DO cry! Not just very often…

So here’s a list of my most memorable or embarrassing moments in my life were I, mike the invincible man cried.

1. Umiyak ako when I was about 7 when I banged a door on my hand.
-Grabe! Umiyak ako dahil grabe talaga ang sakit! Sa Baguio pa kami nakatira no’n. Sobrang bigat nung pinto. Sobra dami dugo. Sabi ng dad ko, narinig daw ang iyak ko hanggang John Hay.

2. Umiyak ako when I was in grade 3. Nalaman ng dad ko na from top1 in class sa isang quarter, naging top 5 the next quarter.
-Shit! Ang nerd ko nung elementary ako. Dyahe (nabawi ko ung top one na un dammit!!)

3. Umiyak ako nung 1st tym ko makipagsapakan (grade four ata, pero di sa skul nangyari).
-Malamang umiyak ako. Talo ako eh (Ang laki ng p***ng ina!!).

4. Umiyak ako nung namatay si Optimus Prime sa Transformers the movie.
-NOOOOO!!! My hero! Si Super Idol! Namatay!! Hindi maaari!!

5. Umiyak ako nung namatay si Yellow 4 sa Bioman.
-Kung yung ibang boys dati, crush nila c Pink 5. Ako crush ko nun si Yellow
4 (ung photographer, hinde ung Indian wannabee). Stupid monster with the tommy gun. Why’d he have to kill her? I cried my eyes out.

6. Umiyak ako when I was about 12. Nasa States kami, uuwi na kami sa Pinas.
-Obvious ba? I didn’t want to go back to the stinkin’ hell hole that is the Philippines.

7. Umiyak ako nung binasted ako nung grade 7
-So what if I was 13?! So what if she was 3 years older then me? It still hurt dammit! Pero di ko ginawa in front of her! I went home, went to my room, locked the door and let the tears roll down. I remember my mom knocking on my door and I went "Leave me alone *sniff* *sniff*!!!). God, sobra pathetic...

8. Umiyak ako nung pinatay c Mel Gibson sa Braveheart
-FREEEDOOOOM!!! Buti nalng madilim sa sinehan.

9. Umiyak ako nung Highschool nung nag bonding kami magkakabarkada.
-To those that don’t know. All boys school ang LSM (highschool ko). Maybe it was the alchohol, o senti lng talaga kaming lahat. Bottom line: Soooo Gay!

10. Umiyak ako when I read these girly novels: A walk to Remember, A Love Story, Beach Music and a Sydney Sheldon book (don’t remember the title).
-What can I say? They pulled on my heart strings. *sniff*. Oh yeah, ung walk to remember, ke Kabo un, di ko pa sinosoli. Malamang si Kabo umiyak din sa book na un.

Lindsay Lohan Fully Loaded

2005-07-26T18:27:00.000+08:00

Today, xtiane, jm and I went to laguna to get a "crash course" on RF IDs (yes, sad to say di parin kami gumagraduate *sigh*). We arrived there around 9:30 am and we were done by about 11:00 am. Sobra bilis lang! Why waste a perfectly good rainy day right? So we decided to watch a movie at Market Market (first time ko pumunta dun!). There weren't any good movies (watched the island and fantastic 4 already), so we ended up watching Herbie Fully Loaded.

Which brings me to my point... I realized Herbie wasn't the only one who was fully loaded. Is it just me or did Lindsay Lohan's boobies get... er... "Fully Loaded" as well (what is it with me and boobs these days dammit!?)? Sabi ni Tay nag pa boob job daw si Lindsay Lohan. It's probably true..'cause those things weren't fully loaded in her previous movies! She didn't have big boobies in parent trap!! Hehe!! Of course she was just twelve then... but what about freaky friday huh!? she wasn't packing when she did THAT movie... granted I didn't watch her other movies (like *mean/nasty girls *not sure sa title, or *confessions of a teen age drama queen *girlie movie = mike not watching it), but I saw the trailers and still, the same observation!!! Small Boobies Baby!!

Pero in fairness... bagay namn sa kanya ung boobs nya. And I think gumanda ulit sha. Pangit nya sobra sa mga music videos... parang addict, sobra payat. At least, ngayon cute ulit sha. Parang nung Parent Trap days nya... Nice smile, Flaming Red Hair, freckles. But now, she has big boobs!! My compliments to the silicon and the plastic surgeon!! Good job!!

Oh yeah? How was the movie? Being a disney movie, which means its a feel good, morally driven, experience directed at the whole family, and considering we were 3 twenty somthing 6th year ECE students snickering the whole time watching the said movie, and not to mention the fact that Lindsay Lohan was more fully loaded than herbie, i'd say the movie was worth it.

Drawing Comics and a Song Post

2005-07-24T15:10:00.000+08:00

Passed by Comic Quest yesterday to check out some comic books I have no intention of buying. And as usual, I took a quick peep at the independent comics section. Again, as usual, being the egotistic, self confident, self centered, bragger that I am, I snorted to myself "These Suck!!". "Kaya ko gumawa ng masmagandang comics dito!!"

And seriously speaking, all braging aside, kaya ko talaga. I honestly think I can make a better comic than most of the Independent comics I see in the market. Than why don't I? Because I don't have freakin' discipline... Since grade school, I started about 7 comic books and I didn't finish a single one. Why? It was a combination of conceptualizing a comic on a scale so epic i couldn't finish it if I wanted to, losing interest and distractions (school work and a little PS2). Bottom line, I lacked discipline. I finished one series, but I had a tracer, I mean partner (hehe), plus he mostly took care of writing the dialogue. We made that series in five years!! And I think we created something that is probably better than 90+% of the independent comics out there (we're planning on releasing it of course). And now that it is over we're starting a new series. BUT, I ALSO want to start something and finish it on my own for once. I want to make a comic book that's all me!!

And that's what i'm planning to do. 18 pages (i'm starting small this time), i've got it all planned out. I'm planning on finishing this thing. And when its done, there's only two things that can happen. Its either I eat my words because I made a crappy comic book, or my egotistical bragging was right on the money all along. This time, I'm gonna stick it out 'til the end to find out.

--------

The follwoing lines have nothing to do with my ramblings above. I've been reading some of my friend's blogs recently, and I came across a couple of "Song Posts". Being the shameless copy cat that I am, gagaya din ako. Eto ang song post ko:

Friendship
Sponge Bob Square Pants

You don't need a plane to fly
Plastic wings can make you cry
Kites are made for windy days
Lawn chair with baloons, fly away!

Oh Inflatable pants!!
You may as well see!!
If you want to fly
All you need... Is friendship
Yeah

What if a Harry Potter movie was directed by...

2005-07-22T23:38:00.000+08:00

The next Harry Potter movie (the goblet of fire) is coming out soon. The first two were directed by chris columbus who failed miserably at bringing the books into the big screen. Next was that e tu mama tambien guy (cuaron) who directed azkaban, he did a better job, but he too, in my opinion failed. So I thought, what if 3 of hollywood's most famous directors took a crack at making a Harry Potter Movie, what would happen?

So here's the scenario, Harry Potter and Voldemort are about to fulfill "the prophecy". With all the death eaters watching, Harry Potter and "He-who-must-not-be-named" will battle to the death. Given this scenario, lets see how the directors handle the scene. And oh yeah, since they are such big shots, let's assume these directors screwed JK Rowling and wrote their own script. haha!

Lets get down to it...

What if a Harry Potter movie was directed by George Lucas?

Movie Title: Harry Potter Episode 7: Return of the Wizard

Lord Voldemort is played by a tall man in a black suit. He wears a mask to hide his disfigured face. You can distinctly hear his breathing. He is voiced by James Earl Jones.

Script:
(Voldemort and Harry Potter are on a hanging bridge perched upon a bottomless chasm)

Voldemort: I see Sirius has taught you well young Potter...

(Voldemort and Harry duel, they fire spells left and right. Harry's spells are blue in color, while voldemort's are red)

(after some lame fight sequences... harry gets his hand chopped off)

Voldemort: Join me Harry! Together... we will rule the wizarding world!!
Harry: Never!!! I will never join you!!! Y-You killed my father!!!
Voldemort: Harry... I AM your FATHER!!!
Harry: NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Voldemort: Search your feelings Harry... you know it to be true!
Harry: That's not true! That's impossible!!

end scene

Here's the second one...

What if a Harry Potter movie was directed by the Wachowski brothers (the guys who made the matrix)?

Movie Title: Harry Potter Revolutions

Lord Voldemort is played by Hugo Weaving

Script:
(It is night time. It is raining. Harry and Voldemort are in an abandoned city street. With Death Eaters on both sides watching, Harry and Voldemort meet)

Voldemort: Mr. Potter... welcome back. We... missed you. Do you like what I've done with the place?
Harry: It ends tonight.
Voldemort: I know it does! I have seen it! That's why my Death Eaters are just watching! They know that I'm the one that beats you!!

(A Staredown insues. The Orchestra music swells to a fevered pitch. Harry and Voldemort run towards each other, wands firing, in slow motion. They throw their wands away and start kung-fu fighting. They fight on the street, they fight inside abandoned buildings, they fight in the air! Lots of Bullet time shots)

end scene

and finally...

What if a Harry Potter Movie was directed by Quintin Tarantino?

Movie Title: Harry Potter Vol. 7

Voldemort is played by Samuel L. Jackson
Bellatrix Lestrange is played by a Japanese school girl with a ball 'n chain

Script:
(Harry attacks Voldemorts hide out. He does battle with the Death Eaters 88. A gory battle occurs, where in the aftermath, countless Death Eaters lie dead and bloodied. Some of them have arms, legs and heads cut off, blood spurting out like water from a hose from the open wounds. Voldemort appears in the balcony)

Harry: Anymore subordinates to kill?
Voldemort: Silly little motherf***ing boy wants to play with a motherf***ing wand...

(Bellatrix Lestrange comes down some steps in a school girl outfit. Harry eventually kills her. Harry and Voldemort move to a Japanese garden with fake snow all around them. They battle)

Harry: You stupid MOTHERF***ER!! YOU KILLED MY MOTHERF***ING PARENTS!! IM GONNA MOTHERF***ING KILL YOU!!
Voldemort: I'd like to see you try you MOTHERF***ER! I'M THE MOST BAD ASS MOTHERF***ING WIZARD IN GOD'S GREEN EARTH! YA THINK YOU CAN TAKE ME YOU MOTHERF***ER!?
Harry: Who are you calling a MOTHERF***ER MOTHERF***ER!?
Voldemort: You MOTHERF***ER!! Crucio!!!

(Harry gets hit by the spell and screams in pain)

Harry: MOTHERF***ER!!!! That MOTHERF***ING hurts!!!
Voldemort: Yeah... That's right! SCREAM MOTHERF***ER!!!! Scream for your MOTHERF***ING mommy and daddy!!!
Harry: You MOTHERF***ER!!!! AVADA F***IN' KEDAVARA!!!!!

(Voldemort gets hit, and crumples to the ground)

end scene

The Island

2005-07-22T02:30:00.000+08:00

I watched the movie last night. ASTIG!!! LUPIT!!! It's one of the best movies I've watched this year (Its up there with Batman Begins and Sin City)!! After ung crap of a movie that Pearl Harbor was, nakagawa c Michael Bay ng malupit na movie experience that is The Island. What can you expect? Well a Michael Bay movie = Lots of Panoramic Shots, Lots of action which means, things exploding, cars tumbling around and lots of special effects. But this time, he has a great story to go along with all the eye candy.

The Island takes up the same topic and moral questions that Sixth Day did (cloning), but did way better than Arnold's crap 'o rama. Instead of an old , grotesquely muscle bounded california governor, you get a padawan obiwan looking ewan mcgregor (who I think is a better leading guy compared to that idiotic ben affleck and faggoty josh "cry baby" Hartnett of Pearl Harbor) and Scarlet Johansson.

Which brings me to my next point. If you don't think the explosions, special effects and a good story are not good enough reasons to watch the movie, here's another: Scarlet Johansson. She is HOT!! Para shang Jessica Alba and Charlize Theron (tama ba spelling?) rolled into one, hot mikealicious momma! I want to father her babies!!!

Watch the movie! 'di kayo magsisisi...

The Top 10 Unanswered Questions of My Generation

2005-07-19T10:38:00.000+08:00

While I was trying with all my effort to listen to Mr. Tehido (my TH 141 teacher) yesterday afternoon, a classmate of mine (di ko alam kung sino, I don’t know anyone in the ateneo anymore!!!) commented on something by Thomas Aquinas (probably his proofs of the existence of God). I’m not going to get in to the comments made (don’t worry, wala ko balak mag mukhang nerd), but what caught my attention was part of my teacher’s response. “There are questions that cannot be answered clearly yada yada yada… yackity shcmackity…” This thought, like so many random stuff, caused my mind to wander, not aimlessly though, not this time. The thought gave me an idea for a list. Here it is..

The Top 10 Unanswered Questions of My Generation

Description:
Here is my list of what I think are questions (relevant or not... mostly not relevant) that my generation can relate to. These are questions that have not been answered because:
a. because it cannot be answered or...
b. putting an end to the debate by answering the question would ruin a perfectly good debate question, or mostly
c. answering such ridiculous questions is a complete waste of time....

10. Sino Mananalo? C Mario o si Sonic?
-in this corner, the plumber from italy, the pizza loving, mushroom eating, fireball spitting Mario!!! in the other corner, the blue streak, the chili dog munchin', ring collecting, speedster... Sonic the Hedgehog!!

9. Cno ba talaga masmagaling? Ateneo o DLSU?
-Katipunan vs Taft. Blue Eagle vs Green Archer. Cno ang masmagaling? Who cares!? UP namn ang number one school sa Pinas di ba? No body remembers second place dammit!

8.namatay ba talaga c rene requiestas?
-This is stupid.

7.Is the present undertaker the original one?
-Yokozuna beats Taker. Taker comes back with Paul Bearer, becomes a bad guy. Another Taker comes back sporting purple (how gay), becomes a good guy. They fight. bad taker loses and disappears forever. Dami nagsasabi na ung natalo na Undertaker ung original, ung nanalo replacement kc nagaway ung original Taker at si Vince McMahon.

6.Binenta ba talaga ni Mike Cortez ung game 3 Nung Ateneo-la Salle finals?
-DLSU: "Oo!! Binenta ni Cool Cat ung game!" Rest of UAAP: "mukha... di namn ganon kapangit laro ni Cortez..." ATENEO: "Who gives a rat's ass!? Basta kami ang nanalo!!"

5.Namatay ba talaga ung original na Ultimate Warrior?
-Nagwrestling daw si Ultimate Warrior at si Earthquake. Binuhat daw ni Warrior si Earthquake sa ibabaw ng ulo nya. Pumutok daw ung bandaritas sa mga braso mi Ultimate warrior. Pati Ugat pumutok daw. Dead Ultimate Warrior.

4.Ilan ba talaga ang lihim na paraan ni Dennis ng Ghost Fighter?
-Si Eugene may Rei gun. Si Alfred may Spirit Sword. Si Vincent may Itim na Apoy. Si Dennis may lihim na paraan. Ubod ng dami ng lihim na paraan. 'sang katutak na lihim na paraan. Bawat kaaway nya, me bago shang lihim na paraan! "Gagamitin ko na ang lihim na paraan..." "Lihim na Paraan? Ano un!?" "Mapanganib ang lihim na paraan..." Siyet!!!

3.sayote pie? o Apple pie?
-Sabi ng mga counter guys sa Mcdo apple daw... pero lasa talagang sayote eh...

2.Namatay ba si Richard sa last Episode ng Daimos?
-"Riiiiichaaaaard!!" "Eriiiiicaaaaahhh!! (repeat many times until ears hurt)"

1.Ano ba talaga si Grimmace?
-What in the blue hell is that faggoty, purple...thing!? Ube ba (wala namn ube sa mcdo)!? Alien!? Troll!? Goblin!? Ooze?! Glob!? Giant Purple Flubber!? Jelly Ace!? Purple Tae!? What are you Damn Youuuuuuuu!?!?!

Harry Potter Marathon!!!

2005-07-17T15:44:00.000+08:00

Just finished Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. I got the book at around 10:30 this morning. Considering It is now around 12:30 in the morning the next day... I have been reading for roughly 14 hours, stopping only to eat lunch and dinner... The ordeal has left my eyes stinging, my head hurting and my stomach grumbling... Was it worth it?

Well... I'd have to say yes. Reading the half blood prince reminded me why i enjoyed reading the Harry Potter books. It made me forget that book 5 ever happened. I remember i read through all the Harry Potter books in one day... except the 5th one. It took me a whole week to read the 5th book. And I was pleasantly surprised at finding I couldn't stop reading the sixth until i'd finished! Ah the nostalgia. The 5th book is nothing more than a nightmare.

Off course I don't want to write down any spoilers (depressing magbasa ng spoilers!!!) But, safe to say, I enjoyed the books steady pace and its twist and turns... I especially liked the fact that harry isn't written as the very whiny protagonist he was in the 5th book. I also ejoyed Harry's new romantic relationship... It's was so Spiderman!

Over all, I liked Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince as much as the 4th book, which I think is second best in the series. Azkaban is still the best of the six.

Crossing my fingers for the 7th book (Sana Maganda rin Dammit!!! Dami ko ng pinuhunan sa series na to... Pag pangit madedepress ako!).

Big Boobies!!!

2005-07-16T14:19:00.000+08:00

This happened a week back or so...
One Saturday, my tito invited me to tag along with him to one of his lunch meetings with one of his clients. I don't know why he invited me, maybe he just wanted to take advantage of his client, who was paying for the food, or most probably he just wanted someone to drive him to the place. But regardless, I readily agreed. "Free food is always good food" i always say,
The lunch meeting was in albas (that spanish eat all you can place in Eastwood. We (me, my tito and tita) got there early and i eagerly stuffed my face with food! Then, his client came. She too wasn't alone. She brought some family, at least i think they were. Anyways, this one girl really caught my attention (this girl i later found out was the client's daughter). She wasn't easy on the eyes, but she had the biggest set of mammary glands i've seen... EVER! They were humungous! Gargantuan! Enormous! They were very, very, very large!! Plus, she was wearing clothing that "accentuated" her.... umm assets.
She sat across from me and despite my best efforts. I couldn't help but ogle at them! They were mezmerising to say the least! I couldn't help it, I was hypnotized by those... things. They had their own gravitational pull. Needless to say, i was so distracted by this display, that i had a hard time eating. Its not that i was attracted to her, like i said, she wasn't really easy on the eyes. I was just so damn distracted!!! The whole time I was there, I willed myself not to stare, plus i hoped that the people around me didn't notice how uncomfortable i was...
Well they did. My tito and tita at least. On the way home, i couldn't help notice the two of them grinning at me. Until tita Marilyn broke the ice and accused me of staring at the girl's breasts... Nobody talked for a while. Total silence. I didn't know what to say. I just stammered...
"B-but...but they were soooo big!"
And we all started laughing are asses off all the way home! Yes! in my family, elders don't berrate us young guys for ogling at girl's love handles... they compound the wrong doing with a sizeble amount of mirth and laughter!! Never have i been prouder of my heritage...

Riding the Bandwagon

2005-07-15T12:30:00.000+08:00

Hello!!!

As of late, ang dami na sa mga friends ko gumagawa ng blog. C xtiane, martin and JM, anak ng, pati narin c Tay and Charles na dapat nagtratrabaho, nag blog. Get to work Lazy Bums!!! (kala ko panay pagdownload ng porn inaatupag ni Tay... guess i was wrong). So, since i don't have anything better to do (with my 2 very boring classes this sem), why not make my own blog i thought to myself.

So here it is. Mike once again joining the Bandwagon.

This blog will contain 3 general types of threads

1. Would be stuff that happened to me recently... Since i'm currently living a VERY BORING existence, don't expect anything much here.

2. Stuff that happened before. Mike Classics!!! Back when life was fun! Nung Elementary! Nung High School! Nung College and di pa nag graduate mga friendly friends ko. Funny Stories like ung underwear incident ni Lem or ung blue eagle story namin ni Darn.

3. Mike's Rambling's about Movies, Comic books and anything under the sun (pagbigyan nyo na ko pls?).

Mike's Blog is Open!

2005-07-14T17:21:00.000+08:00

This post is a test....

i repeat, it is a test. nothing of interest is written as of yet.