Mike’s 4 Steps in Dealing with Frustration

Step 1: Sarcasm
I ride the MRT going to and coming home from work (dati going to work lang, but since nag resign na si LaC, wala na ako sasabayan every afternoon going home. Sad). Now, If you haven’t tried taking the train at around 7 in the morning or around 5 in the afternoon, you should. ‘Cause your missing a lot boys and girls! What fun it is to abandon all sense of decency to fight your way through the dreaded hordes in order to pack yourselves like sardines inside the train. And the aroma is just divine. Oh yes, the sweet heavenly smell of day old sweat clinging to the bodies of your fellow passengers is like aged wine to the senses. I urge everyone to give it a try.

Step 2: Ranting
To those of you who don’t know, the MRT adapted the system that the LRT1 uses. It reserves a car exclusively for female passengers. I’m cool with that (I’m not sexist). What I find annoying is how some of the female passengers insist on riding on the other cars even though one car is reserved just for them. Now if the other cars were relatively vacant I wouldn’t mind. But there I am trying with all my might to move my body away from some guy’s crotch when some woman tries to squeeze herself into the already packed car even though the car for women has tons of space! What’s with that dammit!? If the girl is with company, say her boyfriend or some friends, I, again, wouldn’t mind her in that part of the train (cause, cheesy as it may be, I don’t think its fair to separate people who don’t wanna be separated). But those loners, what reason do they have for making life difficult for all the passengers? Is that how they get their kicks? Or is it some perverse fetish perhaps? Whatever it is, damn them!!!

Step 3: Funny Anecdote
The train ride to work this morning was horrible as usual. The train was so packed that I thanked God for every station we passed, edging me closer to my stop; Ayala Station a.k.a. Sweet Freedom. When the train reached Ayala, I scrambled my way to the train’s doors (everyone scrambles, either you move fast or you get off on the next station) when somebody grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the door, hard! “What the hell is going on?!” I thought to myself. When I got out of the train, I saw that the person who was pulling my hand for dear life was some girl (not a pretty one if your curious). “Uhm…” I said making my presence known. The girl turns around, catches sight of me and says; “Ay…” It dawns on me she grabbed my hand by mistake. The hand she should’ve taken was…

I looked behind me and there he was. An orc in all his glory. He gave me his “hath-garesk-Shuk-bah” (translated from orc: “Insolent-human-I’m-gonna-rip-off-your-penis-and-stuff-it-down-your-throat) look. In response, I wanted to give him my “as-if-I-grabbed-her-hand-she-grabbed-mine-so-get-out-of-my-fuckin’-face-jabronie” look, but since he looked like an orc on steroids, I gave him my “erm-I-have-no-idea-what’s-happening” look. Apparently that was good enough for him. Phew.

Nagulat cguro ung girl when she realized she was holding the hand of a man-god instead of her sorry excuse for an orcfriend. Ahahahahahaha!!!!

Step 4: Song
When the fantasy has ended
And all the children are gone
There’s something good inside me
That helps me to carry on

I ate some bugs, I ate some grass
I used my hand, to wipe my tears
To kiss your mouth, I’d break my vows
No no no no no no way jose
Unless you want to, then we break our vows together

Encarnacion
Encarnacio –oh ho ho on
Encarnación (doobeedee doobeedee)
Encarnacio-oh ho ho on